User:Kippy/That time I was nearly raped by Glenn Beck in 1990
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He kinda looked like this, only less of a pussy.
It was fucking Glenn Beck! OMG!
So there I was[edit | edit source]
in 1990, finishing my shoe shopping thing at Payless, right? Like real "OMG, a 20% discount on those gorgious shoes!" shit.
then this fucking guy[edit | edit source]
comes out from behind an alley, drunk all over the place, rambling to himself about Progressives and the government, and instead of passing out he makes a far rightline straight for me.
So then he pulled out a[edit | edit source]
knife and held it up to my neck, and said, "If you scream, I'll slash you", and starting taking off my clothes! : (
So I kneed him in the balls and got the hell out of there. 33 years later, he's hosting his own show on Fox News.
No, seriously. Glenn Beck nearly raped and murdered me.
See Also[edit | edit source]
- That time I was nearly raped by a yak during my sojourn in Canada
- Did Glenn Beck Rape And Murder A Young Girl In 1990?