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“Nobody knows what it's like to be the madgirl... to be the sadgirl... behind blue eyes...”

Helen Beta Narbon, mad geneticist, is a long-running member of of the Howard Lovecraft Medical Institute, a three-time Nobel laureate-by-force, and so much more awesome than certain mad cyberneticists that they will not be named here in order to spare them a horribly ego-shriveling comparison.

The Origin of Helen B. Narbon[edit | edit source]

Helen B. Narbon was pretty much a totally ordinary biochemistry student and human clone until a spaceship carrying legendary mad scientist Hakubi Washu crashed into her apartment, depositing the intergalactic supergenius directly into Helen's clutches. At first, she felt the urge to get help, as any sane person would. Then, something about the situation snapped her fragile sanity like a stick of stale Pocky, and she was sane no longer. With megalomanical glee, she challenged the second-greatest mind in the universe to a chess match, and won. The prize? Washu, yielding, allowed Narbon to devour her brain and attain all of her vast knowledge (and hair).

Eventually, for reasons that only Narbon's infinite intellect can fathom, she felt it necessary, or possibly just amusing, to concoct an elaborate cover story involving an Italian bistro in order to explain her descent into madness.

World Conquest Plans[edit | edit source]

She's not telling.