User:DriftKing18594

“POWERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

~ Jeremy Clarkson on DriftKing18594

“My super fantastical super fun time best student ever!”

~ A random Japanese person who spends his time drifting his Toyota on mountain roads on DriftKing18594. This same Japanese person taught him how to drift.

“What's this kid's name?”

~ Oscar Wilde

“He called me fat!”

~ Mary Harney

“Duh?”

~ Brian Cowen

“DRINK! FECK! ARSE! GIRLS!”

~ Father Jack on DriftKing18594

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Some random shit

EXTREME HATE WARNING!

This Page Hates you. You will be hated by one person every second you're on this page.

People beaten by him on Forza 2 on Xbox Live since you came here:

People who have outsmarted this guy since you came here: None, you retards!

This User is too Damn Sexy! If you saw this user it's possible that you might fall to the ground and worship him/her, or spontaneously combust from a sex drive overload.

Quotes about him

Check the top of the page, retards.

Intro

DriftKing18594 is a 14-year-old genius from Ireland. His girlfriend is your mom but he wishes it was Nathalie Kelley, who starred in the Fast and the Furious Tokyo Drift...oh, damn she's hot...yeah...yeah...sorry, I was masturbating there for a second. He loves drifting and drives a Nissan Silvia S15. Eat smoke, bitches! Anyway, he is a fucking master at Need For Speed and beat Ryo Watanabe. Yes, I know, your character was called Ryan Cooper, but it was based on him!

This is what happens when you want porno but you can't because you're in fucking SAUDI ARABIA!!!

Education

He has a degree in bullshit and economics. He also kicked your ass while playing GTA IV on Xbox Live.

He gratuated from the Fred Ucker College of Kia-smashing (F.U.C.K.), and has a black belt in the martial art of dorifuto soko.

Rides

• 1999 Nissan Skyline
• 2008 Nissan GT-R
• 2001 Nissan Silvia
• 1994 Mazda RX-7
• 1983 Toyota Corolla
• 2005 Ferrari F430
• A piece of crap Kia he uses for target practice.
• Your mom

Here we see one of the most deadly of the Skylines, the GT-R R34 Nismo Z-tune. its unbeaten :D:D:D and it's FUCKING MENTAL!!!

Websites he is on

• Bebo
• YouTube
• StreetFire

OFFICIAL WEBSITES!!!

• http://www.bebo.com/DriftKing18594
• http://www.youtube.com/DriftKing18594
• http://www.streetfire.net/profile/DriftKing18594.htm

More random shit

Look, it's Candice Michelle...now my dick's hard...

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                                                You like her, don't you?

Uncyclopedia:Babel

n00b This user is a n00b. n00b

BS This userpage is bullshit. BS

This user should not be trusted.

NO This user doesn't care. NO

This *bleep* user likes to *bleep* the use of *bleep* *bleep* profanity *bleep*

This user believes that there's nothing like a proper Jihad to ease your pain

This person helps reduce over-population by killing people, thus helping the environment.

This user is left-handed. In Latin, they would be sinister. (list of left-handed Uncyclopedians)

This user's head A SPLODE.

This user is a mutant.

I am an Aspie, and thus a member of the Master Race; bow before my intellectual might, puny neurotypicals! (alternatively, punch them in the face and steal their lunch money)

This user does not have a user page at Wikipedia because they think that they take things way too seriously over there.

This user is of the genus Fuckinous Randomious and has eye beams.

This user can drift and beat D.K. Personal Details Member of the Order of Uncyclopedia This person has successfully registered on Uncyclopedia. They should be proud of themselves for making such a smart move. DriftKing18594 Real Name: ****** ******** Age: 14 Gender: Male Member since: September 2008, I guess Occupation: Drifter Special Abilities: Drifting a Nissan GT-R, even though that has SOOOOO much grip. Favorite Article: Probably this. Least Favorite Thing: Prison...whoops, I mean school! Weight: Between 100 and 120lbs Weapon(s) of Choice: A nuke, bitches ! Girlfriend: Your mom, but I'm currently doing Nathalie Kelley in the back of my Skyline.