Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/UnNews:Louisiana Governor brazenly taunts volcanoes (quick)
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UnNews:Louisiana Governor brazenly taunts volcanoes [edit source]
this one was good enough for the unnews front page. good enough for a feature run, d'you think? 22:26, 2 March 2009 (UTC)
| Humour: | 5 | Some parts are funny some are lacking. The part with the "Did you like that line about the eruption of spending? I'm particularly proud of that one. I mean, I have eight full-time speech-writers, a publicist, and a dozen or so interns that really don't have any functions, and I came up with that myself! Impressive, right?" was very funny. Try to get more things like this in the article. It just seems a little too sophisticated at some points. The first paragraph is pretty slow, and it starts to cause the reader's attention to drift. Try to put in some more behind-the-scenes type comments, poking fun at the political people, as I believe that is what the UnNews (and the Daaily Show) are for. Some jokes are funny, but others lack witty jokes that a featured article needs. |
| Concept: | 8 | It's a good concept. I mean, making fun of volcanoes? That's hilarious. You just need to expand on this. Have the governor respond to the responses. Try to make it a little longer while keeping up with clever comedical input. |
| Prose and formatting: | 9 | Not really much to say here. Grammar is good. |
| Images: | 8 | The images are just fine. The captions are funny. The only suggestion I would make here is to move the 2nd image to the left, ya know, to give it some balance. |
| Miscellaneous: | 7 | I hate the misc. score, but this is pretty funny, while not perfect, so a 7 it is. |
| Final Score: | 37 | Not yet ready to be featured. Try working on it a little bit, take my advice, and resubmit it to Pee Review. Overall, pretty good. |
| Reviewer: | --Smokin' Cheddar BBQ: The King of the Triangular Snackfoods | |