Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/The Best From Southwest
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The Best From Southwest[edit source]
Narutoman1111 19:27, October 2, 2009 (UTC)
- It has 3 days to go before it's ICU expires, but I will pick this one up in hope that you can successfully recreate the article in your user space. 24 hours. --ChiefjusticeDS 07:22, October 5, 2009 (UTC)
Humour: | 1 | Alright, since your article is in ICU for not enough funny you should try to ignore the scores in this review and focus on what you can do to improve it. Firstly, you have picked a very challenging format for yourself here but there is no reason you can't make it work. The very first thing you should do is have a quick read of HTBFANJS and then decide on a set of things that you can be amusing about. In your case it could be things like, places the CD could be/has been played, the reasons for the creation of the CD in the first place and the CD's reception. All of these things leave room for expansion. You are already using Wikipedia's format, so take a look at an article there that has a similar structure to the one I suggest you follow, here is a good one to start with. I would suggest that you completelt steal the style of the Wikipedia article, if you take a look you will notice that there is quite a large number of prose in the wikipedia article when it is compared to yours, so take my suggestions above, or use your own and put some prose in, your article currently has virtually no jokes, obviously it should. |
Concept: | 2 | Your concept also can be much more than it is at present. Remember that this is Uncyclopedia, therefore you don't have to stick to saying "This was a bad CD, so bad in fact that nobody has ever heard of it, but it did exist, honest." You can even try something like this author has done here and act as though the CD was a massive smash hit, use your imagination. I would however caution against name-dropping if you do something like this. A lot of users fall into the trap of saying things like "Meat Loaf was involved in the creation of the album, the beatles consulted on the video and Britney Spears was paid not to be involved at all." While there is humour here, it can be cut down and excessive use of band names just irritates readers, try to be feasible and amusing at the same time. Personally I can see how this idea can be made into a success, all you need to do is work hard at it and if in doubt ask for help. |
Prose and formatting: | 1 | Not much to be said about the current revision, but I will, as I have been doing give you some advice for a rewrite. Proofread your article carefully at all times, after any major additions read it back carefully and identify any typos or grammar errors. Now for a lot of people the idea of spending hours writing something, only to have to spend yet more time rereading it and correcting it, is not fun. Other people just don't feel that they can proofread effectively; all these people are encouraged to turn their work over to the uncyclopedia proofreading service where devoted red pen waving users will proofread for you. If this is not for you then feel free to proofread carefully yourself. Also remember to put some images in, be creative choosing them and make them compliment the text, a good idea would be a CD cover, that was relevant. If you are having trouble finding one then you can ask some helpful users to make you an image (just ask nicely). As a rule of thumb try to include at least 2. |
Images: | 0 | Nothing extra to say here. See above under prose and formatting. |
Miscellaneous: | 2 | My overall grade of the article. |
Final Score: | 6 | Right, if the ICU tag expires, contact Mordillo or Modus and ask them to restore the article to your user space where you can work on it in peace and without fear of it being deleted. I really think you can make something of this article and all it will take is some hard work. Feel free to ask other users for help and advice. If you want to ask me anything, make a comment, or request feedback then feel free to contact me on my talk page. Good luck making this work, I really hope you do. |
Reviewer: | --ChiefjusticeDS 10:37, October 5, 2009 (UTC) |