Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/My girl's best friend
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My Girl's Best Friend[edit source]
I quickly wrote this for PLS and think it has WAY more potential than it actually attains. Any help would be great. Indepth only and peeing member please! ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 22:36, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
- Um, I'm not a PEEING member, but you seem kind of desperate, and I've taken an interest in your article. You can try to hold out, or you can settle for me.
Aethix ~ Talk|Contributions|My project 01:25, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
Oh wow sorry forgot this was up here. Ya of course Aethix I am fine with anyone doing this really at this point. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 16:47, 1 May 2009 (UTC)
| Humour: | 8.5 | I've got to say, this is funny. Not only is it funny, it is consistently funny. The only reason you didn't get a ten was because it seemed a little forced. In a lot of places, "yeah" is spelled as "ya". The dialogue could use some commas in certain places. For example, the line "What why?" could be made "What, why?" Another thing is, the second-to-last line really ends the article with a bang. The last line, when the narrator says "ouch", sort of makes it fizzle. |
| Concept: | 10 | Not much to say here, the concept is great. |
| Prose and formatting: | 7 | There are a few issues here. As I said before, there could be a few commas in the writing to make the article flow better. Also, tone down the capitalization a bit. It's fine if you capitalize one or two words in a single sentence, but in the shorter sentences, or areas that aren't really sentences at all, an exclamation mark usually suffices. |
| Images: | 8 | Good, but not great. They do portray the scenes really well, but there isn't much laugh-out-loud hilarity in most of them either. (except maybe the hippo one) Most of the hilarity comes from the captions. So if you can find more pictures to put in that are funnier, then great. If you can't, I wouldn't worry about it too much. |
| Miscellaneous: | 8.4 | Averaged your other scores. |
| Final Score: | 41.9 | I think this ought to be featured. It just needs some cleaning up, really, and it will shine. |
| Reviewer: | -- Aethix ~ Talk|Contributions|My project  23:16, 1 May 2009 (UTC)
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