Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/How To: Wake Someone Up
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How To: Wake Someone Up[edit source]
Tell me what you think of this How To. Seunketchup88 05:28, 22 February 2008 (UTC)
- OH GOD I'm sorry bro. I just realized that I forgot this from a few days back! Oh, now I sure feel like a dick. Let's get to it already, yeah? ~Minitrue Sir SysRq! Talk! Sex! =/ GUN • WotM • RotM • AotM • VFH • SK • PEEING • HP • BFF @ 23:50 Feb 28
| Humour: | 6 | So, I see some better stuff in here than your other articles. It's a very good effort. But there's still some content in here which is really lacking. Things like "I suggest some Boom Bap type rap music. Blast Krs-One's "Sound of the Police", Nas' "New York State of Mind" Planet Asia's "Definition of Ill" or Soulja Boy's "Crank Dat"." really stand out as unnecessary and unfunny. You could still work out a lot of these jokes and make this a really great article. |
| Concept: | 8 | Not bad! I won't lie to you, I'm pleasantly surprised. Your beginning and ending are really spot on, way to think outside the box with this HowTo:. It's a pretty original idea, making this a very enjoyable read. I can see that you're really developing your skills as a writer and coming up with some clever stuff here. Way to go. Not really sure why the 7 foot green guy is there, but perhaps you were going for the absurd humor thing. Either way, I like it. |
| Prose and formatting: | 5 | This really needs to be proofread. You have a lot of mistakes like "If there is no earthquake, you must grab them by the arms and shake it like a saltshaker as hard as you can." Change the "it" to a "them" because you're talking about a person. There's plenty of other errors like this one, such as errors in punctuation, capitalization, and grammar. I'd do it for you (and I probably should for putting this off for so long) but I'm too lazy. Get someone else to do it for you, or just rum it through a spelling and grammar check. But that's not really why this score is so low. It's really that god-awful list there at the end. HTBFANJS warned you against ridiculous, random lists. I'd recommend that you either ix-nay that whole thing, or integrate it into a real paragraph. Actually, just go ahead and get rid of it. |
| Images: | 7 | The images were okay. 7 being an average score according to Cajek's scale, I think it's an appropriate one. The first image was pretty good, the second one was very good, and the third one kinda kills it. (what with the watermark and all) I would try to replace that last one with a grumpy looking woman in a robe or something. Keep the caption the same and you're golden. The only other way that I would improve this score is with another adequate image. |
| Miscellaneous: | 6.5 | Averaged. |
| Final Score: | 32.5 | Overall, I'd say this is my favorite one of your articles so far. You're showing real improvement here. Stay dedicated and you'll be writing even better articles. A score like this is still far from VFH, but it's certainly nothing to be ashamed of. It still needs work, but remember that you have the resources to fix it. Don't be afraid to ask other users to help you. That's what UN:PS and UN:PEE are here for. You're already using UN:PEE anyways. Nice article, good luck fixing it up, and I can't wait to read your next one. |
| Reviewer: | ~Minitrue Sir SysRq! Talk! Sex! =/ GUN • WotM • RotM • AotM • VFH • SK • PEEING • HP • BFF @ 23:50 Feb 28 | |