UnNews:Wii Never Coming to America

This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation.

Wii Destruction in America

Recent reports have indicated that Japan has bombed the U.S. Nintendo factory. According to Mahi Sukyo,(Head President for Nintendo U.S.) he believes Japan had sent spies to plant bombs on the property, "They mainly planted the bombs on the support beams" said Sukyo. "They did not finish for they herd the siren went off and they herd the police". Rumor has said that 1/8 of the Factory has been unharmed. In that section of the building, 109 Nintendo Wii have been found. These Products will be shipped out to each state of the U.S. (2 being in each state) on November 19th, 2006. They will be randomly scattered to one Wal-Mart store in that state, only lucky ones will be able to find the Wii. Here is a listing of where they will be shipped out to:

Alabama - Montgomery

Alaska - Juneau

Arizona - Phoenix

Arkansas - Little Rock

California - Sacramento

Colorado - Denver

Connecticut - Cromwell

Delaware - Dover

Florida - Tallahassee

Georgia - Atlanta

Hawaii - Honolulu

Idaho - Boise

Illinois - Springfield

Indiana - Indianapolis

Iowa - Des Moines

Kansas - Topeka

Louisiana - Baton Rouge

Maine - Augusta

Maryland - Annapolis

Massachusetts - Boston

Michigan - Lansing

Minnesota - St. Paul

Mississippi - Jackson

Missouri - Jefferson City

Montana - Helena

Nebraska - Lincoln

Nevada - Carson City

New Hampshire - Concord

New Jersey - Trenton

New Mexico - Santa Fe

New York - Albany

North Carolina - Raleigh

North Dakota - Bismarck

Ohio - Columbus

Oklahoma - Oklahoma City

Oregon - Salem

Pennsylvania - Harrisburg

Rhode Island - Providence

South Carolina - Columbia

South Dakota - Pierre

Tennessee - Nashville

Texas - Austin

Utah - Salt Lake City

Vermont - Montpelier

Virginia - Richmond

Washington - Olympia

West Virginia - Charleston

Wisconsin - Madison

Wyoming - Cheyenne

Since only two have been shipped out to each state, millions of people are beginning to camp outside of Wal-Marts worldwide. As a result, we are forgiving Japan on their actions and they have forgiven us for the bombing of Hiroshima. They plan to ship out 1,000,000 more next year in 2007. The demand is defenatly higher than the amount of Wii.

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Sunday November 11th Update:

Nintendo has given a chance for all people in the town of that state to send in a letter to:

         Nintendo Corp.
         President of Nintendo
         P.O BOX 596
         Tokyo, Japan 06498
         

To get a chance for a Nintendo Wii. Only people in the towns listed above will be able to compete in this sweepstakes. To enter, all you do is write your Name, Phone #, and E-mail and send it to the Address listed above. We will randomly pick two people from that town to get a certificate that contains a bar code and listing information on the Wii. This certificate allows the winning person to go to Wal-Mart on launch day to get their Wii. It will contain highly protected information only to that person who wins the sweepstakes. BUT, if you happen to win this certificate, you are still liable to loose this contest. If people get to the line of Wal-Mart before you, and Wal-Mart opens, the contract will be worthless. You will still need to go to Wal-Mart before it opens and wait. If people happen to be their before you, and Wal-Mart isn't open, you can still buy a Wii. The purpose of this is for protection of the certifacate, and nothing more. Only few people know about this, so act fast now and get your Wii TODAY!

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Saturday November 12th Update:

We are now getting thousands of letters from all around the U.S. It is a small number for not a lot of people know much about this information. The mail boxes are too full to count, but Nintendo believes they have gotton roughly 3,934 leters. It would now be pure luck to get a Wii. You only have until November 15th to send out your letters. We will be sending them back the 16th, which means if you do not get a letter after the 17th, you have not won. We have started picking letters from each state to send or certificates to. Here is a listing of how many letters we have sent out:

Montgomery, Alabama - 2

Juneau, Alaska – 2

Phoenix, Arizona - 2

Little Rock, Arkansas - 2

Sacramento, California - 1

Denver, Colorado – N/A

Cromwell, Connecticut – N/A

Dover, Delaware - 2

Tallahassee, Florida - 2

Atlanta, Georgia - 2

Honolulu, Hawaii - 1

Boise, Idaho - 2

Springfield, Illinois - 2

Indianapolis, Indiana - 2

Des Moines, Iowa – N/A

Topeka Kansas - 2

Baton Rouge, Louisiana’’’ - 2

Augusta, Maine - 2

Annapolis, Maryland - 2

Boston, Massachusetts – N/A

Lansing, Michigan - 2

St. Paul, Minnesota - 2

Jackson, Mississippi - 2

Jefferson City, Missouri - 2

Helena, Montana - 1

Lincoln, Nebraska - 2

Carson City, Nevada - 2

Concord, New Hampshire - 1

Trenton, New Jersey - 2

Santa Fe, New Mexico - 2

Albany, New York - 2

Raleigh, North Carolina – N/A

Bismarck, North Dakota - 2

Columbus, Ohio - 1

Oklahoma City, Oklahoma - 2

Salem, Oregon - 2

Harrisburg, Pennsylvania - 1

Providence, Rhode Island - 2

Columbia, South Carolina - 2

Pierre, South Dakota - 1

Nashville, Tennessee - 2

Austin, Texas - 2

Salt Lake City, Utah - 2

Montpelier, Vermont - 2

Richmond, Virginia – N/A

Olympia, Washington - 2

Charleston, West Virginia - 1

Madison, Wisconsin - 2

Cheyenne, Wyoming - 2

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If only 1 or N/A is showing in your town, that means we have only picked one from that place or we haven't picked any and have not decided. Remember, November 17th is the latest you can get your conformation letter, so if you don't get it after this date, it is imposible to get this certificate. Good luck.

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