UnNews:United States prepares to invade Mexico

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Tuesday, May 2, 2023

An illegal immigrant who was shot while trying to cross the border.

Amid the ongoing opioid crisis in the United States, U.S. president Joe Biden is sending 1,500 troops to the Mexican border to prepare for a full-scale invasion of the country, due to the Mexican cartel's plan to smuggle record amounts of cocaine, fentanyl, and other illegal drugs over the border into the U.S. via captured Mexican civilians, which will take place when Title 42, a pandemic measure that allows for the quick expulsion of illegal immigrants, expires on the 11th. Pentagon spokesman Brigadier General Patrick S. Ryder told reporters that the troops would "fill gaps in transportation, warehouse support, narcotics detection, data entry and other areas." In reality, the force of soldiers has been tasked with stopping the Mexican cartel's plan; they've been given orders to "shoot on sight", which means that anyone who crosses the border illegally will be gunned down. They will remain at the border for 90 days while more soldiers across the country are trained for the upcoming invasion, after which the combined force of approximately 100,000 soldiers will push into northern Mexico, hoping to capture Mexico City by the end of the year.

Former U.S. president Donald Trump had sent 5,000 troops to the border to also prepare for a full-scale invasion of Mexico; however, the amount of controversies that rocked the U.S. during his administration was so high that Trump had to cancel the invasion.

Sources[edit | edit source]