UnNews:Russell Brand's "Brand" of humour raises eyebrows

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
UnNews Logo Potato.png This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation.

16 February 2007

Verily a wanker

The Brits' return to live broadcasting on Wednesday night sparked hundreds of complaints about host Russell Brands own special "brand" of humour.

ITV1 had received around 300,000 calls and emails from viewers by Thursday morning, expressing nonplusment at what in merry hell Brand was jabbering on about. Media watchdog Ofcom logged a further 10,000.

First-time host Brand, known for his own unique "brand" of humour, was thought to be largely speaking English throughout the performance but it is thought it was a form of the dialect that was last seen in the 1540s.

One complainant in his email said, "at one point I think Russell Brand made some sort of inappropriate comment on Iraq but it may have been my eyes playing tricks. It was all a lot of gobbly gook to be honest". The remarks failed to raise a laugh among guests at the Earls Court ceremony.

Brand opened the show with his own unique "brand" of rapier wit with a few asides that linguistic experts think were about gay cats and scary tattoos. Many of the audience were however openly puzzled at the gobshite coming out from the unkempt lothario's mouth. The verbal offal was interjected with swears and long words that reportedly caused several nervous breakdowns.

Ofcom said the majority of complaints it received concerned "a strange, jibbering tramp that was seen lurking on stage frequently between award presentations. Many did not even realise that he was, in fact, the host of the show!"

Despite the furore, ITV1 said it was happy with Brand's performance, "with his own particular "brand" of topical humour we think he injected a new zest into this years Oscar ceremony. We believe it worked well and apologise that the point of him escaped much of this nations great unwashed" an ITV spokesman sneered derisorily last night.

Russell will be bringing his own personal "brand" of topical diatribe in his upcoming LIVE tour of Wessex next month.