UnNews:Richard longs to kill Judy

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12 May 2014

Richard with a gun concealed behind his back, thinking about a quick shot in the nape of the neck, executioner style.

Richard Madeley, of Britain's ever-popular presenting duo Richard & Judy, has revealed he longs to kill his wife with a revolver.

A question about his attitudes to euthanasia gave rise to a surprising diatribe. "I wouldn't give a tuppenny if there was a risk of being prosecuted. If the time came - God forbid - when Judy was, say terminally ill, or, you know, really forgetful, or something, I'd want to put an end to my - an end to her suffering."

Madeley continued: "If, when the time came and Judy said to me, 'But what about you? What about the risk of prosecution?', I'd say, 'That's my problem, I'll deal with that, don't worry about it.'

"And for me, it would be the locked room, the bottle of whisky and the revolver. I wouldn't want to mess around. Right between the eyes. Point blank range. Just a little hole between her eyes. Hardly any blood. But a little, yeah. A little blood. Just enough to let you know it was all over."

Finnigan - much as she did years ago when realising she had exposed her breasts at an award show - reacted to the news with an inscrutable mix of good grace and absent eyes. "No, no, we did. We did, speak of that. Richard spoke to me about it.

"We acted it out once with some ketchup and a water pistol."

Sources

• Leverage, "Richard and Judy agree assisted death pact" BBC, May 12, 2014