UnNews:Prolific UnNewser gains prestigious award
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This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation. |
10 August 2009
LIVERPOOL, UK -- When Uncyclopedia Admin telephoned retarded reporter, 'never mind the quality, feel the width' Rols McMad to inform him that he had just won the inaugural 'Prolific Reporter And Tubby Twat (PRATT) of the month' award, dyslexic right-hander McMad was over the moon.
"I haev bin watign four tihs mai hole lfie" announced the two year old Scouse father of five. "Ist a drmea coem treu!"
Uncyclopedia have been very wary of awarding awards to UnNews competitors. "The fact is that they are a bunch of tossers and some of them toss better than us", argued Mad Max. "The truth is that once we award this prestigious award, they ponce off with their supermodel girlfriends and we never get another article from them."
It is still undecided what format this award will take but Uncyclopedia have offered a 100U (special Uncyclopedia currency) reward for the first graphic specialist who can come up with the desired logo.
Uncyclopedian of the century, Mordildos, let out a loud burp before going on to witter, "He has no idea of how to format bullet points, squirt an alcoholic fly or throw darts, but I do like him!"
This brand new, yearly award has been hugely contested among Uncyclopedian admin staff. Some think it is right whilst others think it is wrong. Still others wonder what the 'Joseph and Mary' the other two are on about.
The whole concept of 'Reward by Award' has been questioned by none other than the infamous Crosby poet Roger Van Gogh. "I can't help but think that if Shakespeare had been turning in his grave today, there would have been a right kerfuffle." Twisted Uncyclopedian loser Van Gogh then continued by kissing his own ass in typical ambidextrian Crosby fashion before retiring to the 'Men's room'.
Sources[edit | edit source]
- Uncyclopedia "Uncyclopedia award" Uncyclopedia, 09 09, 2009