UnNews:Another celebrity death in 2016
Monday, June 20, 2016
LOCATION -- Yet another celebrity death has reared its ugly head. In what seems like an elaborate hoax or sick joke, UnNews has learned that CELEBRITY has died tragically from CAUSE OF DEATH. GENDER PRONOUN was only AGE. LENGTHY EXPLANATION OF CAUSE OF DEATH.
CELEBRITY was best known for CLAIM TO FAME. GENDER PRONOUN (POSSESSIVE) many credits include (FILM|SONG|ALBUM #1), (FILM|SONG|ALBUM #2), and most famously, (FILM|SONG|ALBUM #3), which won GENDER PRONOUN (AWARD|RAVE REVIEWS|ADORATION|POPULARITY|MONEY).
(DIRECTOR|ACTOR|BANDMATE|ETC.) fondly remembered CELEBRITY with this heartwarming message:
"TEAR-JERKING QUOTE, MEMORY, OR ANECDOTE."
PERSONAL OPINION, REFLECTION, MEMORY, OR ANECDOTE THAT WILL MAKE THE UNNEWS AUDIO EXCEED 10MB AND NEED TO BE SPLIT IN HALF.
I still can't believe that CELEBRITY died. Please 2016, Grim Reaper, Donald Trump, please stop killing everybody! We already lost Lemmy, David Bowie, Alan Rickman, Glenn Frey, Abe Vigoda, Merle Haggard, Prince, Muhammad Ali. We damn near lost Lil Wayne! We also damn near lost Meat Loaf! Meat. Loaf. That would've been tragic. And now we've lost CELEBRITY! This has to stop! I say we impeach The Grim Reaper. Who's with me? Let's get Bernie Sanders to be the new Grim Reaper, since it looks like he won't be the next President, unless there's an upset at next month's Convention.
RIP CELEBRITY YEAR OF BIRTH - 2016.