UnNews:83% of people not looking where they are going

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Tuesday, April 14, 2015


Look at this cunt checking his email on a train platform. This bitch is going to walk straight into you because she has had enough of that song. This bitch is actually playing Candy Crush on the street.

Up to 83% of the population are now not looking where they are fucking going, a new study suggests.

Experts explain that eternal types such as rubber neckers, map-reading tourists and wannabe-bohemian-book readers have been joined in recent years by users of phones, tablets and MP3 players in not using the fucking eyes they have in the front of their fucking heads to look forwards.

The situation has become so serious that so far in 2015, head-on collisions have become the 3rd most common cause of cranial trauma in the Western world, after car crashes and face-palming.

"Long term studies show a gradual reduction in people looking where they are fucking going (PNLWTAFG) over the last 50 years," explains study leader Joanna Corey. "However, this trend accelerated considerably in the mid-1990s, with the take-up of mobile phones.

"Major introductions such as the ipod, smart phones and the iPad have all given regular boosts to the PNLWTAFG numbers, and if we continue at this rate, literally no one will be looking where they are fucking going by 2019, meaning it will be physically impossible to navigate your way through a mall or a high street.

"Maybe even sooner if that fucking Apple Watch takes off."