Template:Religion Lead article 1

Stop dressing like whores, you whores! BNEI BRAK, Israel -- Local conservative rabbis are sick with worry, anxiety and unease at the increasing popularity of practical, comfortable fashions; more so even than the worry, anxiety and unease that causes their usual kvetching. After much bickering they have responded with the tact, sensitivity and delicate touch for which fundamentalists of all stripes are known; by burning down stores that sell offensive clothing and spraying bleach on women that Rabbi Yosef Elyashiv refers to as "...those nasty whores with their whore legs, whore skin and whore bulges. Whores!". [ ± ] - Image credit

---

Instructions for {{Lead 2.1}} (Return to the UnNews Front Page):

• id – Don't change – Each of the five lead templates has its own number to indicate its position on the Front Page
• image – The image name (omit File:). There should always be an image, but if you leave this blank, the null image Spacer.gif will be used
• width – Desired width of the image, in pixels, usually 100px

Use of "type=" produces graphics like this. Use them only in the 1-Spot. In the side-by-side leads (2- through 5-Spots), these graphics mess up rendering on smaller screens.

• type – Normally none or leave blank. Otherwise, one of the following:
  • breaking for especially timely or time-critical stories
  • special
  • original for stories with {{Original}} instead of real sources
  • exclusive for "exclusive interviews," especially when they are exclusive because we're interviewing ourselves
  • urgent
  • editorial (2.1) for stories tagged as UnNews Editorials
  • column (2.1) for stories tagged as UnNews Columns
  • feature (2.1) for articles that are featured on the Uncyclopedia main page
• title – The page name (omit UnNews:); that is, the headline
• short_title – Optional – If the page name is too long or doesn't look like a headline, provide the desired headline here.
• summary – The first sentence or two of the story. If you can write a funnier lead by pulling stuff from throughout the story, that would be funnier.