Stoned

Duuuude, have you heard of this, like, World Trade Center? We should, like, do something to it, man ...

“The Virgin Mary ... Don’t throw into the ocean ...”

~ Charlie on baptising Aaron

Stoned is like ... something ... I dunno, man. I was talking to this, like ... cat ... and he says, "Dude, I like, so totally respect you." And I'm all like, "What? Like, yeah, sure man." And he's all like ... uhh, yeah. Like, did I tell you about when I was talking to this cat?

Methodology

Like, did I tell you about this guy, man?

To get stoned, you gotta, like ... uhh ... like, buy a big ass bag of weed, man. Hey, you know what we should do? We should like, call up this guy, and tell him his refrigerator's running, but, like, get this: IT WON'T BE!!! HAAHAHAHAH! Aww man, that would be like, so funny. Hey, do you notice like, how the walls got feelings, man? They get all, like, mad, or something, when I like, paint them. Hey, did I tell you about the time I talked to that cat?

Duuuuude, that Bird!

If you're stoned

If you're stoned, you gotta, just, relax, man. DUUUUUDE! Look at that bird! It's all, like, flapping it's wings, man ... Whoa, that's, like, deep ... Did, did you know, that, I like, respect you? No, I'm serious man. I, I just want you to know ... are, are you listening? You listening? Cause I'm serious, man. I like, so totally respect you. You're like, driving your own car and stuff! That's, like ... uhh, yeah. Hey, did I tell you about the time I talked to that cat?

Look at those things man!

Look at your hands

Whoa ... Bro ... Look at my hands bro. They're like ... like I don't even have words bro. They're so ... man! I mean, they're like a bunch of little hot dogs attached to a plate man! It's so weird! Look at my fingers, they're so nuts. And they move bro. Look at 'em go! And they're so ... so big, man! I could crush something with these man. They're like ... dangerous. Like one time I saw this cat right? If I held it in my hands, I could totally ... like ... hurt it. But I wouldn't do that, man. We talked and he was super smart bro. Did I tell you about it yet?

He knew what was going on bro.

Bob Marley

Dude, we need to put on some tunes to ... you know ... help me like mellow out. You know what I mean, bro? Bob Marley! We need to listen to some Bob Marley man. That's just the shit. Bob knew what he was talking about you know? Like ... We gotta stand up for our rights and shit. Yeah, except I really just wanna chill right now. Did you find that CD yet? I think it's under the ... the thing, you know? Shit. I totally forgot where it is. Damn, man. I totally need some Marley right now. Dude, have you ever seen Bob Marley's hair! It's craxy but, you know, in a good way. You know ... It kinda looks like a cat. Hey man, have I ever told you ...

How my homeboy think he look. When I flip him over he run away on all-fours and hide under the table.

AW SHIT

Aww shit, it's the man!

AGH! It's the man! He's gonna be all like "Hey, you can't do that!" and I'm gonna be all like ... aww, no, here he comes.

What's going on, you two?

Uhh, like, uhh, you know how, um, you got this whole prison thing? We gotta, like, not go there, man.

Are you smoking Marijuana? I'm gonna have to take you in.

WHOA!!! Not cool, man. Do you know how, like, you gotta, umm, not go there? Say, officer, did I tell you about the time I talked to that cat? No? Well man, we've gotta go, alright? (stands in same spot with blank expression)