Skibidi coup
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The Skibidi Coup is a term used to describe the anticipated nationwide American uprising, which many analysts predict will erupt following the complete ban of the social media platform TikTok. This phenomenon, particularly popular among Generations Z and Alpha, has long been criticized for spreading shallow culture, misinformation, brainrotting, and the overall decline of collective intelligence. The event, often described as a "digital revolution with brutal consequences," represents a bloody and violent uprising by a segment of society aiming to liberate the world from the effects of internet-induced degeneration.
Reasons[edit | edit source]
The uprising reached its peak on August 21, 2025, when President Donald Pump permanently banned TikTok (unlike his January attempt, which lasted a miserable two days—an event that definitively cemented his reputation as a complete idiot). Immediately after the announcement, the country witnessed a wave of suicides among children born after 2013. But the chaos didn’t end there. Violent outbreaks erupted nationwide, with the most shocking occurring in Washington, D.C., where a Chinese tourist was brutally lynched near the Capitol by a mob of eight "brainrotters." Their battle cry—“You’re not Skibidi Sigma enough, and your aura is negative infinity!”—shocked onlookers and sparked outrage both domestically and internationally.
Generation Alpha, led by none other than Baby Gronk himself, launched a large-scale assault on the Capitol, overthrowing the sitting president and dissolving the entire government. The United States of America ceased to exist, replaced by a new regime: the United States of Skibidi Toilet (USST).
The new government was composed entirely of TikTokers and Streamers, the very icons of brainrot culture. Livvy Dunne was installed as Vice President, while Ninja took the role of Defense Minister. The composition of the new administration was described by commentators as a "living nightmare." Along with the restructured government came utterly absurd laws:
- Mandatory low taper fades for all citizens.
- Implementation of a Fanum Tax for anyone refusing to acknowledge the new government’s authority.
- The national anthem was changed to Swag like Ohio.
- The only permitted game was Fortnite.
The arsenal of the former U.S. military—including the Army, Marine Corps, Air Force, and Navy—was confiscated and repurposed. The Sigma Boys, as the military was now called, outfitted their vehicles and bases with massive speakers blasting brainrot music at deafening volumes, aiming to indoctrinate the civilian population. The new Commander-in-Chief of the military was none other than Logan Paul.
Under the rule of the USST, dissenters faced brutal punishment. Those who refused to abide by the new government’s rules were arrested and subjected to torture through endless brainrot content. While the general population suffered, newly appointed Police Chief John Pork only added to the growing frustration among citizens. Vice President Livvy Dunne further mandated compulsory gymnastics for all citizens, claiming it was necessary to "maintain national Skibidi Sigma energy."
Ordinary people were pushed to the brink. Their anger simmered as once-respected institutions transformed into a circus of streamers and influencers. Secretly, a resistance movement began to take shape, driven by a shared hatred of the new regime.
First Phase[edit | edit source]
USST reached its peak in 2026. A government dominated by TikTokers and streamers ruled with an iron fist, persecuting dissenters and spreading brainrot culture as a new way of life. Citizens increasingly conformed to mandatory low-taper haircuts, compulsory gymnastics, and the relentless blare of brainrot music. The world watched the chaos with a mix of horror and fascination. The USST sought to improve its international image and prove that Generation Alpha had something valuable to offer. This effort was set to culminate at a TED conference in February 2026.
The event, held in San Francisco, was promoted as a grand opportunity to showcase the intellectual prowess of the new government to the global public. The keynote speaker was none other than Baby Gronk, the self-proclaimed leader of Generation Alpha and one of the architects of the Skibidi revolution. His speech, a propaganda masterpiece, aimed to convince the world that brainrot culture was the dawn of a new era of progress and creativity.
The TED auditorium was packed with influencers, USST government officials, foreign diplomats, and journalists. Gronk stepped onto the stage dressed in an extravagantly luxurious white suit adorned with diamond chains that sparkled under the spotlights. He began his speech with phrases that were intended to sound philosophical but came across as a series of nonsensical exclamations:
"Generation Alpha is the new age of humanity! Our Sigma energy powers the world, and our Skibidi culture will unite everyone!"
Initially, the audience applauded—some out of fear, others out of brainrot loyalty. But as Gronk continued, his attempt at a serious intellectual address quickly unraveled. Midway through his speech, he uttered a sentence that would seal his fate:
"You are all my Skibidi Sigma Rizzlers!"
The words echoed through the hall. Most of the audience laughed, clapped, or recorded the moment on TikTok. But in one section of the crowd sat a young man who reacted very differently. He was a twenty-year-old named Elliot Barker, a former soldier from the now-dissolved U.S. military. Elliot had lost his family during the chaos of the brainrot revolution. His younger brother, indoctrinated by brainrot propaganda, had joined the Sigma Boys and died on a “civilian re-education mission.”
To Elliot, Gronk’s words were nothing more than a mockery of his family’s death and the collapse of everything he once held dear. As Gronk’s rambling continued, Elliot’s patience snapped. Rising from his seat, he calmly walked to the stage and drew a .410 Bore revolver.
The movement was swift and precise. Elliot aimed the gun directly at Gronk, whose expression froze in a mix of shock and incomprehension. A moment later, Elliot pulled the trigger. The sound of the gunshot filled the auditorium. The bullet struck Gronk in the temple, and his body crumpled to the stage, the diamond chains clinking softly against the floor.
The audience froze in shock. Some screamed, while others instinctively pulled out their phones to record the unfolding chaos.
Elliot was immediately subdued by Sigma Boys guards stationed at the event. However, the damage had already been done. Baby Gronk’s death was a spark igniting a powder keg. News of the assassination spread worldwide within minutes.
For many Americans, the death of Baby Gronk was a call to rebellion. Resistance movements, which had been quietly forming across the country, were galvanized by renewed hope. Organized groups began to rise against the USST, destroying speakers broadcasting brainrot music, attacking Sigma Boys units, and sabotaging brainrot infrastructure.
The death of Baby Gronk marked the beginning of a new chapter in the fight against the USST—a struggle that would determine whether the nation could break free from the grip of brainrot culture or succumb to its chaotic rule forever.
Second Phase[edit | edit source]
After the assassination of Baby Gronk, violence erupted across the USST, fundamentally altering the nation's trajectory. Previously underground resistance movements united to form the reborn armed forces of the former USA, encompassing all major branches: US Army, US Navy, USMC, and USAF. It was a desperate but determined effort to restore the original America, even at the cost of enormous losses.
Weapons were initially sourced from military museums, private collections, and old stockpiles that had been overlooked for decades. Outdated but reliable weapons of World War II, such as Garands, Springfields, Brownings, Colts, Thompsons, and BARs, were brought back into service. Many resistance fighters relied on these historical weapons, as modern American arsenals were entirely under the control of the Sigma Boys and their brainrot army.
An unexpected ally emerged in the form of the Swifties, fans of Taylor Swift. Initially apolitical and themselves infected by their own brainrot culture, the Swifties decided to join the resistance after the USST banned Taylor Swift for lacking "sufficient sigma energy." Hundreds of thousands of fans, mostly young women, took up arms and formed their own divisions within the resistance. Some units even adopted names inspired by Taylor's albums, such as the Red Division or the Midnights Task Force.
The resistance had nothing to lose. Weapons considered obsolete on modern battlefields, and even prohibited under the Geneva Conventions, were deployed without hesitation. Flamethrowers, flame tanks like the M4A3R3 "Zippo," chemical weapons from the Vietnam era, and napalm all saw action. Improvised death machines, including car bombs loaded with explosives, often driven by volunteers with no other options, became a common sight.
In response, the Sigma Boys declared martial law under the orders of Livvy Dunne, who also initiated total mobilization of the population, including children. Abrams tanks were deployed, but due to the brainrot logic of their leadership, their weapons systems were deactivated, turning them into intimidating patrol vehicles rather than effective combat units. These tanks appeared everywhere—cities, rural areas, even highways—serving primarily to instill fear.
The global community, shocked by brainrot culture and the USST coup, did not remain idle. Countries such as Germany, Poland, the Czech Republic, Japan, and even Central Asian states began secretly supplying the resistance with decommissioned weapons. Obsolete on paper but lethal in the hands of determined fighters, weapons like Mannlicher rifles, Leopard 1 tanks, Grad rocket launchers, and more flowed onto American soil.
The ensuing battles were extraordinarily brutal. Both sides suffered massive losses. The Sigma Boys, mostly composed of small, brainrot-afflicted children, were slaughtered in droves. Though poorly trained and reliant on absurd brainrot technology, their sheer numbers and fanaticism made them dangerous. For resistance fighters, the psychological toll of fighting children was devastating, but in a war for survival, there was no room for mercy.
On the other side, resistance fighters faced their own psychological disintegration. Constant fighting, the sight of brainrot-induced destruction, and the loss of loved ones led to frequent mental breakdowns. Fighters often resorted to drugs or alcohol to cope with the harsh realities of war. Some even defected to the Sigma Boys, unable to withstand the pressure, as brainrot culture offered an escape from their pain.
Particularly fierce battles occurred on the West Coast. San Francisco, the original hub of brainrot culture, became a bloody battlefield where victory and defeat were indistinguishable. Hollywood, Los Angeles, and Silicon Valley were reduced to ruins, with every street contested tooth and nail. Brainrot speakers blasting endless loops of Skibidi songs were destroyed with napalm and grenade launchers by the resistance.
One of the darkest moments of the war was the Kansas City Massacre, where resistance fighters captured an entire unit of Sigma Boys composed of children aged 10–13. These children, indoctrinated by brainrot, were mercilessly executed. Leaked footage of the event divided public opinion—some viewed it as an act of desperation, while others condemned it as a war crime.
Despite the brutality and chaos, the resistance continued to grow. The second American Civil War, now known as the Skibidi Coup, raged on, leaving the future of the USST hanging by a thread.
Third Phase[edit | edit source]
Despite their numerical superiority, the Sigma Boys began to face unsustainable losses. Their chaotic tactics, poor training, and fanatical deployment of child soldiers led to mass slaughters, where resistance fighters had no choice but to kill regardless of the enemy's age or background. When it became evident that the Sigma Boys could no longer maintain control over key territories, they suffered another devastating blow—their leader, Logan Paul, was captured and executed in a manner that shocked even the resistance itself.
Logan Paul, nicknamed the "General Sigma" and the face of the brainrot dictatorship, was apprehended by a unit known as the Anti-Brainrot Klan (ABK). This militant group, comprised primarily of former soldiers and resistance extremists, was notorious for its brutal methods. After a brief "trial" where Paul was charged with war crimes and spreading brainrot culture, he was publicly crucified and then burned alive. The entire process was recorded and uploaded to a resurrected version of YouTube, sparking a global debate on morality and the ethics of war.
Paul's death had a devastating psychological impact on the Sigma Boys. Chaos within their ranks led to even greater losses, and many children began to desert or surrender to the resistance. Meanwhile, Livvy Dunne, facing the complete collapse of her regime, sent a desperate plea for help to allies in Europe, who had previously been "brainrot-cloned" as part of a cultural invasion.
Help arrived in the form of European nations heavily influenced by brainrot culture even before the fall of the United States. Armies of brainrot fanatics from France, Italy, Germany, and the United Kingdom—dubbed the EuroSigma Legions—were deployed. These troops were equipped not only with cutting-edge brainrot propaganda technology but also a fanatical devotion to an ideology blending brainrot culture with military brutality.
The new wave of conflict introduced terrifying innovations:
- Drones with speakers, blasting endless loops of Skibidi songs at deafening volumes, causing psychological breakdowns.
- Brainrot bombs on ballistic missiles, dispersing chemicals that induced temporary hallucinations and an uncontrollable urge to watch TikTok.
- Psychological warfare, including dropping leaflets over resistance positions with slogans like "Are you sigma yet?" or "Your aura is weak."
The EuroSigma Legions were merciless. Liberating cities under resistance control turned into systematic massacres of civilians. Anyone suspected of supporting the resistance faced public execution—whether by hanging, shooting, or, in the worst cases, the "brainrot reset." This horrific process involved implanting a headset that played an endless stream of TikTok videos until the victim went insane.
The resistance responded with equal ferocity. Against the EuroSigma Legions and the Sigma Boys, they employed weapons designed for maximum destruction and suffering. Beyond flamethrowers and napalm, they began using booby traps with chemical agents, electrified barricades, and even biological weapons, such as diseases spread through contaminated water.
The resistance also adopted a strategy of total war. Cities controlled by the Sigma regime were attacked without regard for civilian casualties. Entire infrastructures were destroyed to cut off Sigma Boys from supplies and reinforcements. Explosions targeting gas tanks or brainrot servers caused temporary collapses of TikTok networks, leading to widespread psychological breakdowns in brainrot-affected regions.
The escalating conflict alarmed the rest of the world. Russia and China, initially attempting to stay neutral, began providing covert logistical and material support to the resistance. Russia supplied decommissioned T-55 and T-72 tanks along with anti-aircraft systems, while China delivered old but reliable weaponry like AK-47s and HJ-8 anti-tank missiles.
On the other side, nations dominated by brainrot culture formed an alliance called the Brainrot Axis, which included European brainrot states and regions in Asia and South America. A global conflict seemed inevitable.
One of the bloodiest clashes of this phase was the Battle of Chicago, the resistance's stronghold in the Midwest. The Sigma Boys and EuroSigma Legions attempted to encircle the city, leading to an enormous urban battle. The city was literally torn apart—every street, every building became a battlefield. Fighting raged day and night, often involving heavy artillery and rocket launchers.
In Chicago, the resistance resorted to one of its most brutal tactics: scorched earth. If they could not hold a part of the city, they destroyed it to deny the enemy anything to occupy. Civilians unable to escape often perished under collapsing buildings or were caught in the crossfire.
Despite the horrors of the war, the resistance continued to endure. Their determination, bolstered by growing support from the rest of the world, suggested that the brainrot regime could eventually be defeated—even at the cost of total devastation. The future of the United States remained uncertain, but one thing was clear: the fight for freedom would continue.
Final Phase[edit | edit source]
The resistance, emboldened by its recent successes, concentrated all its forces on Ohio, considered the last major stronghold of the brainrot regime in North America. Ohio had been transformed into a dystopian fortress, where brainrot propaganda dominated everyday life. Every street was monitored by drones, billboards played endless loops of motivational TikToks, and the population was encouraged to engage in fanatical resistance.
The resistance knew that no conventional tactics would work against this stronghold. They resorted to strategies that crossed the boundaries of morality and ethics. Among their most feared methods were psychic drones that emitted signals causing unbearable headaches and hallucinations. Another tactic involved biological attacks, such as releasing mutant rats infected with deadly viruses into the city's sewer systems.
As the fighting intensified, the resistance stopped distinguishing between combatants and civilians. The brainrot population was deemed the enemy by default, leading to mass executions.
Livvy Dunne, the leader of the brainrot regime, retreated to an underground bunker beneath Ohio's capital city during the final days of the conflict. Despite relentless bombardment and attacks from all sides, she refused to surrender, sending desperate pleas for help to the remaining brainrot allies. Ultimately, her position was revealed through the betrayal of one of her generals, who was tortured by the resistance until he disclosed her location.
A special operations unit of the resistance launched a dramatic assault on the bunker, eliminating all her personal guards. Livvy was captured just as she attempted to detonate a suicide bomb—her plan for a "heroic exit" thwarted in the final moments.
Livvy Dunne was transported to a secret location, where she stood trial before the resistance tribunal. Unlike Logan Paul, who was executed immediately after his trial, the resistance decided to use Livvy as a symbol of the brainrot regime’s defeat. She was found guilty of crimes against humanity, genocide, and mass indoctrination. The sentence was clear: life imprisonment on the remote island of Saint Helena, where she would face a total media blackout.
Livvy’s transfer was heavily publicized—a global broadcast symbolizing the resistance’s triumph. Onboard the ship transporting her, her TikTok accounts were ceremonially deleted, and all her personal items associated with brainrot culture were burned.
With Ohio’s fall, the brainrot regime on the North American continent was effectively destroyed. The remnants of the Sigma Boys and EuroSigma Legions either surrendered or fled abroad. While some areas remained under brainrot influence, the resistance began a process of "cleansing"—a systematic eradication of brainrot culture, its infrastructure, and ideology.
The United States, however, lay in ruins. The infrastructure was in shambles, the population drastically reduced, and society deeply fractured. Despite this, the resistance remained hopeful. They believed they could rebuild a country free of brainrot—even if it took generations to achieve.