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Rio Pacheco, the Man du Jour

This is Duran Duran's favorite song to sing on karaoke night at Dave Chappelle's house.

Lyrics

Watching a cartoon now, babe, you're a man with purple hair

But you're not gay, cool, I'm not sure why I would care


When I went to the toy store, there up on the shelf

You know he kind of looks like Ken

I put back my GI Joe and I bought him there and then

Oh good, you brought an overnight bag.


His name is Rio, he's a sexy plastic doll

There's no more waiting for my stupid boyfriend's call

He's made in Thailand, or maybe it's Japan

Oh Rio Pacheco, from Jem and the Holograms


I popped in a VHS with my new toy by my side

Six hours watching Jem reruns, he is my fantasy

All he really needs is a new hairstyle

That Glitter 'n Gold tuxedo always makes me smile


His name is Rio and he just broke up with Jem

Forget about Jerrica in her leopard sweater-vest

Who needs them anyways, they're really the same girl

Oh Rio, Rio, hottest guy in the whole world

More than just a purple-haired Ken doll.


Hey now, wooh, season three, he just saved that girl that almost drowned

At the end of the show, you already know

I'm going to be at home, with him, in bed

Me and my hand, 'cause Rio's better than dating on Tinder

He looks like his picture

And either way I gotta buy my own dinner


His name is Rio, there's no need to wonder why

I like to play with him and dream he's a real guy

But if he was I prob'ly wouldn't be his type

Oh Rio, Rio, my dad thinks that I'm a dyke


His name is Rio, he's way sexier than you

You need to work out more and dye your hair blue

Oh Rio, Rio, he is awesome in the sack

He sure makes up for all the things that real men lack

See also