Peter Frampton
“Doobeedoobebedededededededboppepepdpepewowowowowowaaoow”
“This shit sounds like Stephen Hawking on crack, gonna drop it.”
Peter Kenneth Frampton (born 22 April 1950) is an English rock musician, singer, songwriter, talk box consumer and manufacturer, and producer. He was previously associated with the bands Humble Pie and the Herd. Peter is especially known for using a talk box to scat in what might be considered early Auto-Tune when playing guitar, and he mastered this ability thanks to Stephen Hawking himself. As a result, Peter Frampton contributed to the invention of Auto-Tune, which unfortunately has been ruined by people like T-Panties and Kanye West. He's quite disappointed with what Auto-Tune has become. In 1971, Stephen Hawking helped Peter start his solo career, and in 1976, the young, blond and blue-eyed poodle-haired guitarist released one of the greatest live albums in fucking music history, Frampton Comes Alive! He has released several other albums since, which will never be as good as Frampton Comes Alive! Peter has also worked with the inventor of drumming also known as Ringo Starr, goth inventor John Entwistle, and David Bowie, Mick Jagger's husband. As of currently, Peter is the CEO of the Framptone Company where he sells his own line of custom-made products, talk boxes included!
Early life[edit | edit source]
Peter was born in 1950 to a man and a woman with the last name of Frampton. He attended a technical school with fucking DAVID BOWIE and his dad was a teacher there. Since Peter's dad was a teacher at the same school, Peter was spoiled and got away with everything. A lot of kids were jealous of Peter, but since his dad was a teacher, Peter also got many friends, David Bowie himself being one of them. Peter met David after school, and when David found out his art instructor was Peter's dad, he instantly decided to become friends with Peter.
At the age of seven, Peter decided music was his true calling after having a dream where he saw himself onstage as an adult surrounded by a huge audience. The next day, he went to the attic of his house and discovered some four-stringed banjo ukulele thing and figured out how to play it. Eventually, he taught himself how to play the piano and then guitar.
Music career[edit | edit source]
Early bands[edit | edit source]
At twelve years old, Peter was in a band called the Little Ravens, and during lunch breaks at school, he and David would meet up and play music together. They would also frequently summon Buddy Holly's ghost by playing his songs. Buddy Holly's ghost was fascinated with David and Peter's talent. Buddy Holly then came to Peter in a dream, telling him he would become successful if he kept pursuing music. In 1966, he joined a band called the Herd. By 1968, Peter had his own fan base consisting of teenage girls after being featured in a teenage magazine called Rave. Girls began fantasizing about being Y/N in a Peter Frampton fanfiction. In 1969 when he was 18, Peter helped form a band called Humble Pie with the mod god and junkie Steve Marriott. Then, one day, Peter met Stephen Hawking, who became his mentor.
Solo career[edit | edit source]
In the 1970s, Peter Frampton was living his best life. He had a shit ton of teenage girl fans, and some boys were even gay for him. He was that attractive. In 1971, Peter sadly left Humble Pie after Steve Marriott threatened to kick him out for no reason while intoxicated. Peter decided to start a solo career with the help of Stephen Hawking. He taught Peter the ways of Auto-Tune, which he was trying to invent. Peter agreed to help Stephen invent Auto-Tune, and the talk box came to life. With the help of Stephen Hawking, Peter mastered the arts of using Auto-Tune. In 1972 Peter released his debut album Wind Of Change and Ringo Starr decided to show up. He found Peter very talented and wanted to guest star on Peter's debut album. Excited, Peter agreed. Not only did Ringo Starr decide to join, so did the funk and soul legend equipped with a bad-ass afro, Billy Preston. In the 1970s, Peter started touring because he wanted attention for his solo career. Unfortunately, his early albums didn't gain a lot of attention, but after Frampton Comes Alive! that all changed. Peter put his talk box to good use and used the power of newly invented Auto-Tune to become famous. In 1975, he had a new squad that was his backing band, which featured Bob Mayo on keyboards, a man who, at the time he was recruited, looked strikingly similar to disciple of Satan and Aleister Crowley, Jimmy Page. Peter mostly recruited Bob because of his resemblance to Jimmy Page, but that's something Peter will never admit.
As Peter became more famous in the late 1970s, he turned into a teen idol. Teenage girls and their older brothers were thirsting after his absolute attractiveness. Unfortunately, also in the late 1970s, Peter's fame started to dwindle, and after getting into a car accident in the Bahamas in 1978, he became less successful. Back when Peter was super famous, whenever fans would be asked if they knew who he was, they would start fanboying or fangirling. Now, there was a shit ton of people who were now asking "Who the fuck is Peter Frampton?"
In 1980, tons of people died in a plane crash in Brazil, and Peter's beloved guitars were destroyed. Among the losses included Peter's beloved wife, his black Les Paul Custom, Phenix. He didn't reunite with her until December 2011.
Eventually, Peter made a small comeback in 1986, deciding he wouldn't let himself not be famous anymore. Stephen Hawking wasn't letting it happen, either. In his mind, Peter and he both needed to stay famous due to their invention of Auto-Tune. Peter reunited with Steve Marriott, who accidentally burned his own house down while fucked up on cocaine before they could do a tour together. Peter went into a state of depression after Steve's death, but eventually recovered thanks to his wife Phenix. Now, Peter is still famous but people don't know he invented Auto-Tune (only the boomers know), and he has social media, but unfortunately does not interact with his followers.
Personal life[edit | edit source]
Peter Frampton was married to many women and has only three kids.
In 1972, he married his Les Paul Custom, Phenix and was sued by a rock promoter named Penny after they separated because Peter decided he wanted to stay together with Phenix.
In 1978, after getting injured in a car accident in the Bahamas, he met professional heroin addict and cocaine-consuming guitarist Jimmy Page, who is also a Satanist and Thelemite. Jimmy saw that Peter was in severe pain from his accident and offered to help him. Peter thought Jimmy would treat him in an appropriate way, but Jimmy ended up getting Peter hooked on cocaine and heroin to help him cope with the pain. Peter stayed with Jimmy for a couple months and Jimmy taught Peter about Aleister Crowley and Satan, but Peter didn't seem interested. Eventually, Peter got off the drugs after seeing how terrible drugs truly are, and Jimmy started hating Peter for getting off of drugs.
Peter is also a vegetarian, believing meat is disgusting and should not be eaten by anyone. He is not a vegan despite his strong anti-meat beliefs. Peter does not understand how meat eaters exist and thinks meat eaters need therapy, but knows he cannot do anything about meat eaters. Therefore, he keeps his dislike of meat eaters to himself.