Neu!
| It is requested that an image or images be included in this article to improve its quality. | |||
| Neu! | |||
| Origins | Düsseldorf, Germany | ||
| Year(s) active | 1971-1975/1985-1986 | ||
| Genre(s) | Krautrock, Proto-punk, Experimental | ||
| Label(s) | Brain Records | ||
| Members | Klaus Dinger, Michael Rother, Konrad "Cunt" Plank, Thomas Dinger, Hans Lampe, Eberhard Kranemann, Uli Trepte | ||
“We love listening to Neu! at the prison. Our little Iraqi friends don't seem to take it so well, though”
– Lynndie England on Neu!
Neu! is an experimental rock band from Germany consisting of guitar player The Marquis de Sade and drummer Klaus Nomi. They're known for their complex brand of Music Theory dubbed "Motorik Theory" or "Devolution".
History[edit | edit source]
The Marquis de Sade and Klaus Nomi met as teenagers in a German factory for plastic vomit. They both quickly connected on a spiritual level and connected for their love of Chinese Water Torture, long unkempt hair and hilarious costumes. They quickly took the materials of the fake vomit and made it into guitars and drums. The guitar made from plastic vomit could only play one cord (E Major), which later would contribute to their sound that nearly ended civilization.
They soon hired American bass player/punk singer and then President of the Free World, William Henry Harrison. No recordings of Neu! in this formation have been found, since Harrison was shot by Nomi's father after being sick of hearing them rehearse after only thirty days of being in the band. Keep in mind, they were playing for thirty days straight at this point.
Nomi and "Sade-I-Arabia!", as he liked to be called (which never failed in bringing awkward silence), decided not to hire a bass player or singer afterward, and remained a two-piece band. Some keyboardists and flautists have played as a guest with them, but were shortly executed after.
Later, Neu! signed to Calista Flockhart records, a record company headed by crazy old hermit, Brian Eno. They soon after started developing their now infamous "Motorik Theory". They named it after Motor Rick, a car repairman who was the first to take his own life due to Neu!'s music.
Motorik Theory Explanation, Part 1[edit | edit source]
They have drums which goes like this:
Boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom,
CRASH!
Boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom,Boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom,
CRASH!
Boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom,Boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom,
CRASH!
Boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom,Boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, boom-boom-bah-boom, etc.
Motorik Theory Explanation, Part 2[edit | edit source]
They have guitars which go like this:
Strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-strum-etc.
Critical Reception And Later Years[edit | edit source]
Neu! have been known to make people commit suicide at their concerts within the 7th hour of play. No one has heard a Neu! song all the way through, not even the band member's themselves, because they're usually threatened by local police at gun point to stop playing before anyone else takes their own life.
Their 3 records Listen To This First, Then After You're Done Our First Album Listen To This, and Then Listen To This One Then Proclaim It Our Best Then Listen To The First One Again sold very poorly because critics never got through reviewing it because they all thought, "this is never going to END!" and hung themselves, even though the albums fade out after only 80 minutes because that's the maximum a record can hold. They never realized it because they're rock journalists, and next to lemmings, they're the dimmest creatures of all.
The members are now in prison due to a huge amount of lawsuits and a large criminal record. They are allowed to play their music within the prisons because the government figured that that would be a good way to lower prisoner numbers. The predictions turned out swimmingly.
Many punk and post-punk bands have expressed their love for Neu! and cite them as an influence. However, not one single punk has ever heard the music of Neu!, and they only claim they love them for cred.
Discography[edit | edit source]
- Neu!
- Neu!!
- Neu!!!
- Neu!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- Neu!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- Nnnnneeeeeeuuuuuu!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- Neu!?
Panic! At The Disco Lawsuit[edit | edit source]
Neu! sued the hell out of Panic! At The Disco, a support group for nancy boys, for use of the obligatory exclamation point. Panic! won because they made the point that language can be used in many different ways, and there was no copyright for the exclamation point or where one would be placed. Neu! got pissed, and played five minutes of their music - there were no survivors. Panic! all took razors to their necks, so not all was lost.