Jabot
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The jabot (pronounced 'JAB-OT' or 'JI-BO'), is a frilly neckware invented in the eighteenth century in France. It is worn about the neck. Other common names include: "Homo Necktie" and "The ever so frilly neckware of sexiness".
The Creation of the Jabot[edit | edit source]
The Jabot is named after its inventor, Darth Jabot, who invented it during the French Revolution on his home planet of France. Desperately seeking a protective device for his neck, he tried for a time a ruff, but discovered it severely impeded his accuracy with a lightsaber. Fortunately, he had a well-stocked closetful of surplus bionic limbs for just such an occasion.
Approaching the well-known invention and image consulting firm Lumière & Gai, he described at length his idea for a decorative collar that would both save him from decapitation, and smooth over his image as a ruthlessly cruel and utterly heartless and unfeeling bastard who kicks puppies and maims children for their ice cream.
A few days later, Vraiment V. Gai unveiled several prototype jabots in a variety of fabrics. After a real nail-biter over whether to choose the really smashing paisley silk, he eventually elected to go with a low-lustre satin that blended well with the cape and boots ensemble that was already his trademark look in the Empire.
Press Coverage[edit | edit source]
| “ | The softness and warmth that this piece adds to Vader's already dashing good looks cannot be overstated. While his initial outfit really conveyed a sense of authority and foreboding doom, a jabot adds a certain je ne sais quoi, and sparks a certain romanticism and sense of playful fun, reminiscent of pirates of the 17th century. My timbers surely shivered at the sight of him, and I've two fingers crossed in hopes that he will be scuttling my booty any day now. | ” |
STOP THE PRESSES!!![edit | edit source]
Jabot is destined to take over where ugg boots left off. Next season all the pretty-somethings will be sporting to Vader's next social event. Paris has already been taken by storm and Princess Stephanie of Monaco has returned to center stage to demonstrate wearing it below the belt. The other Paris, who was taken by storm only just last night, has already been rumoured to have ordered 15 gilt-edged versions from Jean-Paul Goatherder.
Whytney Asperger-Corx-Hobbledfeet of the Young Lawyers' Association of Grunta Green endorses the move of the jabot from legal circles (a legacy of Vader's obsession of using lawyers as combatants) to more fashionable types. "I'd just like to vouch for the jabot as being a stately, wearable item of tasteliness that heretoaforesaid was ignored unnecessarily by legions of French peasants who really ought to have known better." Whytney could not be contacted for further explanation of her comments as her home was razed to make way for a super wormhole to be used by inter-galactic schnouzlebeapots. All that remained in the glowing embers were a Star Wars extravaganza toothpick pack and, naturally, a jabot.