Invisible Mosquitos

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"RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!"

Have you ever been walking down the street and suddenly you could swear something has landed on your neck. When you check there's nothing there. You have been victimized by the Invisible Mosquitos.

The Natural Habitat of Invisible Mosquitos[edit | edit source]

Invisible Mosquitos can be found anywhere and everywhere. Well, they can't be found, really. More like felt. Anyway, the point is that they can strike anytime. Since they are invisible, very few photos have been taken of them. But everyone has been bit by one. They are very common in crowded places, such as malls, restaraunts, political speeches, concerts, and your mom's bedroom- or bed. They also live in your basement with Uncle Toby and his partner, Greg. So, whenever your fucking around wasting time and you feel something on your neck, it's not the boogeyman, it's probably some Invisible Mosquitos ready to devour your flesh. Either way, RUN!!!!

Feeding Habits[edit | edit source]

Naturally, Invisible Mosquitos drink blood much like normal mosquitos (doesn't everyone?). Except, if they are left to their own devices for a long amount of time, they'll liquidate and eat your brains too. No more, no less. They usually attack in swarms and almost always make you look like an ass in public when your swatting at the air screaming like a retard. Usually in front of someone you would like to impress.

How to get away from them[edit | edit source]

Respond as you would to the zombie apocalypse; AHHH!!! GET THEM OFF OF ME!!!! GET THEM OFF OF ME!!!!!!!!!

START running, YOU FUCKING IDIOT!!!!!

Prey of the Invisible Mosquitos[edit | edit source]

Everyone and everything. Even other invisible mosquitos. You think they discriminate? They don't discriminate.

Natural Predators of the Invisible Mosquitos[edit | edit source]

There are only a few natural predators of the Invisible Mosquitos. Their main predators are invisible mosquito hawks. Angels are also very good at maintaining Invisble Mosquito populations. These two predators will sometimes mate, resulting in Angel Hawks.

Ways to dispose of Invisible Mosquitos[edit | edit source]

Since they are invisible, it is very hard to dispose of them. But there are a few methods:

  • 1. Get your flamethrower and fire everywhere around you (if you don't mind criminal charges).
  • 2. Stop, drop and roll (this will only delay the mosquitos and most likely only piss them off).
  • 3. Start swatting like crazy (although this will do nothing, it will at least make you somewhat amusing before you die).