User talk:Eish
Welcome![edit source]
Hello, Eish, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, my name is RAHB, and I'll be your guide through the mystical land of Uncyclopedia. We'll begin the tour with a few helpful links for noobies:
- Beginner's Guide - A massive guide about how to be the best you can be at Uncyclopedia. I've honestly never read the whole thing in one sitting myself, but it is very useful if you're looking for help on a specific issue.
- Our Vanity Policies - This page details why we don't care about your friends, your school, your gay fourth period math teacher, or the homework he has you do, and in-jokes. DO NOT violate this policy.
- How to be funny and not just stupid - Our flagship link. This will tell you how to not get booed off the metaphorical stage that is Uncyclopedia. I STRONGLY suggest reading the entire thing through, perhaps more than once.
- Uncyclopedia:Best of - For a bit of inspiration. These are our featured articles. This is the kind of stuff we like to read around here.
Now that that's out of the way, take a look to your right, and you'll notice some more links, these ones are about help in general:
- About Uncyclopedia and The five pliers of Uncyclopedia
- How to get started editing on uncyclopedia
- Help Pages - if you need help with a specific issue
- User:RAHB/welcome - This is a longer version of this message, meant for giving you a more in-depth look at contributing.
At Uncyclopedia, writing articles is not a requirement, but I do recommend it, it can be quite enjoyable, and it's a good chance to let others take notice of your writing. To write an article, it's recommended that you start it in your userspace (for example, User:Eish/Article about stuff) so you can edit it at your leisure. If you decide to create it in the cold world of mainspace, make sure it is in accordance with the policies laid out above, and if you're not done put the "Work-In-Progress" template - {{construction}} - onto it as well.
If you have any other questions, feel free to ask me on my talk page, and also check out the link I mentioned earlier. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply put {{adoptme}} on your Userpage to join. I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian, and remember: Have fun with it. We are a humor wiki, so don't worry about taking things too seriously. We're here to have a good time and to have a good laugh. Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button (
) above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date. Once more, thank you for your contributions and welcome! I'll be seeing you around.
-RAHB 14:08, 2 August 2008 (UTC)
Plugging your own articles[edit source]
Hey, there. I've noticed you plugging your articles in places where they don't belong, particularly in various UnNews articles. I'm just going to tell you that authors do not generally appreciate people adding links to their own articles inside their writing unless the title of your article is already present, or is very, very relevant. Feel free to advertise your articles on your User Page, and interlink them, but don't add sections of text in order to make links to your work. --mrmonkey72 22:10, 2 August 2008 (UTC)
welcome to UnNews[edit source]
Better late than never...
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On your knees, worthy one! The Right Reverend Major Sir Zim_ulator blesses you. Your blessings are increasing exponentially. In the name of Sophia, the Church of Uncyclopedia and the Universal Church Triumphant of the Apathetic Agnostic, kneel and receive the melding of Zim's holy axe and your wetware. Now go write me a good UnNews article. Cheers! |
Welcome to UnNews, Eish, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.
I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.
You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.
If you've submitted an article, and it's disappeared, I may have mercy-moved it to your user space. This means I've probably left a message on your talk page, likely in close proximity to this very message, explaining why.
Your article may have been tagged for ICU if it has significant problems meeting our criteria, or I may have deleted it because you did not register as a user.
Finally, maybe you just pissed me off. I mean, I know I'm a Roshi, and I'm supposed to be all "Zen" about everything, but I have bad days too, you know?
If you are interested in doing an UnNews audio, check this out.
At present, I create UnCartoons for UnNews all by my onesies, for better or worse. Now, I will never claim that I am a good cartoonist. Fortunately, the internet provides us a way to do all sorts of things simply and easily. I found Stripgenerator.com, a great site to create cartoons with a minimum of talent.
- This document is an ongoing effort by me to enhance the obfuscation coefficient of Uncyclopedia; productive changes, and criticism are welcome. Cheers! The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir
Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 17:38, March 28, 2010 (UTC) Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 23:44, 7 August 2008 (UTC)