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Hello! If you want to discuss with me about articles I edited, please go to the Discussion Page. If you vandalise or mess up my page, you WILL suffer I will revert it. If you really feel like messing up people's pages, there's a website for that, and it's Wikipedia. Oh, and, once you get there, please mess up contribute to their pages A Lot. The admins will thank you for that. Thank you for your co-operation.

British flag.gif This user is a total UKer,
...jolly good, what what?!
(British Uncyclopedians)
For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about me.

Welcome to Britain. I hope you enjoy your stay. Actually, you may never go away again. Because...well...things here are run differently, they are run:


Faizaguo (born Yupei Guo) was born in Beijing, China some 15 years ago, on 2nd of August. Which is the birthday of John Tyndall, the D.O.D. of Alexander Graham Bell and the birthday of Alex's worst enemy, Elisha Gray, another inventor of the telephone.

Born on this unfortunate day, Faizaguo spent her childhood in various Scandinavian countries, where she failed to learn Finnish. When she was eight years old, she was unfortunately stunned by a 10000-volt (2 amps) electric current which had made her wonky and a potential star editor of Uncyclopedia indeed.

At the age of ten, she moved to London with her parents. This move has both positive and negative effects. As well as improving her English, exposing her to Wikipedia and Uncyc and James Joyce, it has also exposed her to British Humour, chavs, goths and emos. It was through these three years that Faizaguo learnt about the uncertainties and the misfortunes of life.

Faizaguo is now in China. After surviving huge exams she is now leading a very content life as a Uncyclopedian, faithful kitten huffer and a potential nerdy physicist.

Faizaguo would do anything to talk to James Joyce about Ulysses , talk to George Orwell about 1984, huff a kitten and pronounce it dead and alive at the same time, and go to Cambridge University(for a degree, not as a fugging tourist you idiot).

My Life and Useless Intellects[edit]

Brain.gif This user's IQ is over 132.
pi This user has written pi articles because they like to keep busy while shirking real life responsibilities.
NERD This user is a physicist
Mad scientist caricature.png This user is a Mad Scientist.
Lq-dna.png This user monkey understands biological evolution and wishes to evangelise this fact.


zh-N This user is a native speaker of Chinese.


sa-N This user is a native speaker of Sarcasm.
en-4 This user speaks English at a near-native level.
uk-4 This user speaks Correct English at a near-native level.
fr-1 This user is able to contribute with a basic level of Français.

L'utilisateur parle le français «un peu».

ns-3 This user is able to contribute with an advanced level of Newspeak.

Prole doubleminusunderstand doubleplusgood language.

it-E This user only speaks Italian because it was a required course in school.

Questo utente soltanto studiò l'italiano nella scola, è non l'ha uzzato poi.

la-F This user got an F in Latin and likes their native language better (if they have one).

G Odit linguam usor.

Did you know I got seven A* in my GCSEs? No, you don't. Nor do you need to know. If you happen to be a member of the Cambridge Undergraduate Admission Office you will take this into account, and you will also automatically deduce that I will achieve 4 A* in my [[A-level]s, and you will accept me into the uni, offering three scholarships at the same time and let me pick my own supervisors and lectures, and granting me free access to the Cavendish, the lawn of the colleges and the Fellow's tables, and manufacture my private punt, and demolish that ugly modern art building in Queen's. It's an utter eyesore.

Yeah, Dream On.

Thou art now facing userboxes[edit]

Hanshaketiny.jpg This user is a member of the Welcoming Committee, because no other Committee would take them.

Desencyclopedie.svg This user usually writes french humor.
Fibonacci.jpg WARNING: Keep away from this user as they love the Fibonacci Sequence and anything to do with it.
Pi3.14.jpg This user loves pi

? Do not underestimate the power of It. Underestimation of the power of It will kill you from the sheer power of It.
Bread2.jpg This user is a cereal killer.
Nuvola apps important.svg

This user is EXTREMELY RANDOM Be advised: Approach with caution and a sense of humor.

Screw It.png This user reserves the right to completely screw up his or her edits life by spending too much time on Uncyclopedia.
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext.png This user believes that admins are control freaks.
Bigbroeye.jpg Big Brother is watching this user...and YOU!
中共 This user supports the Communist Party of China, but only because because it's our last chance for global communist domination.
Happy Face.PNG This user likes welcoming new users to the wiki.