User:Dark Paladin X/Protest Warrior
Warhawks strikes again in America. The so called Protest Warrior is a pro-war counter-protest political group (endorsed by warhawks like Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh who routinely "beats up" anti-war protesters whenever any anti-Iraq War protest springs up. Of course, they aren't really beating up protesters, they just simply create their "operations," or counter protests. Sadly, The operations they launched ended up having their asses humiliated whenever they launch their operations. They also have their own signs that hold lots of contradictions because the people who did the signs failed to check their social studies textbooks (as well as showing certain things linking to socialism, which is all bullshit). Their official motto is: "Fighting the left... doing it right." However, they never do anything right, only attempt to humiliate the anti-war pundits and protesters and end up humiliated instead.
History[edit | edit source]
Protest Warrior was founded by two stupid brainless Israeli asshole morons, Kfir Alfia and Alan Lipton. Alfia's family moved to Texas from Israel. Most people in Texas are conservative and love to see America getting into wars, so Alfia became a warhawk himself through libertarian textbooks from Ayn Rand and warhawk magazines like the National Review. He also attended J.J. Pearce High School and University of Texas where he flunked in his history and social studies courses because all his claims and beliefs are a sham (from warhawk ideologies). Alfia stated he loves talk radio and enjoys having sex with it.
Alfia would later meet up with his buddy Alan Lipton and form protest Warrior where they begin to publicly humiliate themselves.
Intentions and Tactics[edit | edit source]
Protest Warrior believes that liberals are pacifist sissies and want to screw over America and create a totalitarian police state (i.e. Jesusland). They state that liberals are a threat to freedom and individualism and socialists taken control of the media (this claim was false, warhawks have taken over the media). They also state that liberalism have connections to socialism, which is total shit since there is no connections between liberalism and socialism. Protest Warrior stated that pacifist morons are driven by hate on America and how liberals blab their mouths on acceptance, tolerance, and peace. On the other hand, while Protest Warrior claimed that liberals don't respect freedom, this claim has been proven to be shit. Liberals do respect freedom while the right-wing are attempting to suppress freedom and kill every homosexuals.
Protest Warrior strategies involves "crashing in" anti-war protests and building irony in their beliefs. Their sign often show doublethink and lots of contradictions that failed to express their war beliefs. They launch their "operations" by disguising themselves as peace protesters and pretend to be anti-war protesters. When the time is right, they expose themselves and attempt to beat up the anti-war protesters. So far, all of their attempts failed and often result in a total mess. After all, Protest Warriors are trying to create more wars by having more people to support wars. Protest Warrior also have videos of their infiltration and their "operations" that stated that anti-war protesters love authoritarian regimes and hate America. However, all the videos were edited by Protest Warrior to convey their message and make their videos look convincing even though all of the content are fake.
Most Protest Warrior opposes homosexuality, abortion, and many liberal ideologies in general while some support the state of Israel and want all Muslims and gays to be dead. Many members are against illegal immigration fearing that the Pod People will take over America. Nearly all Protest Warriors support war, destruction, chaos, and nuking random countries (although Alfia stated that the purpose of war is to spread freedom, he failed to see the irony on this comment). Protest Warrior expect members to freely express hate on Buddhism because Buddhist principles call for pacifism. Some Protest Warriors are Ku Klux Klan who want to kill every Jew, black, and some other ethnic minority person. In other words, Protest Warrior members hate everyone and want to blow shit up.
Protest Warrior's website, however, is full of lies and deceit, since Protest Warriors are liars themselves. In fact, out of over 100,000 anti-war protest they attend worldwide, only 95% of their attended "protest" often result to members driving to that site, beat up a few pacifists, and drive home. When they do so, they take photos of their members beating up anti-war protesters and use Photoshop to skewer the captions saying "ANTI-WAR PROTESTERS BEATING UP WARHAWK." In their online store, they sell coffee mugs, t-shirts, books, and all random shit relating to themselves to show their "accomplishments (which is beating up pacifists)." In addition, Protest Warrior claim to have member who actually been into wars. This is completely false, as Captain Obvious stated that Protest Warriors are really "weekend warriors," where they sit back and relax daily while they hire Blackwater mercenaries to do all the fighting them and take all the credit (by the way, these so called war heroes they have only do military training on Sunday where they skip church).
Operations[edit | edit source]
Here are all of the operations that Protest Warrior launched, all of which had failed. Protest Warriors launched a total of 500 operations over the last 4 years, but let's just go over four of them to save time:
Operation: Wolverines[edit | edit source]
Operation Wolverines (a.k.a. Operation X-Men or Operation Magneto) was the first failed operation by Protest Warrior in 2004. The operation took place from San Fransisco and Los Angeles to Chicago, New York City, and Mars as they attempt to convince people to support the war and "expose" A.N.S.W.E.R. (a.k.a NAMBLA or North American Man/Boy Love Association), an anti-war protest group. During the operation, Protest Warrior noticed A.N.S.W.E.R. were waving Canadian and Palestinian flags and using American flags as napkins. Protest Warrior, with sheer nationalistic fascist fervor, decided to burn the Canadian flags in front of A.N.S.W.E.R. and brought a giant rocket launcher sending 125,000 victory rockets (25,000 rockets were launched per each city) onto the A.N.S.W.E.R. protest rally. The police then later arrested 500 Protest Warrior members and sentenced them to decapitation. [1]
Operation: Hail to the Chief[edit | edit source]
Operation Hail to the Iron Chief (a.k.a. Sieg Heil Bush), launched on January 20th 2005 A.D., shown the entire world the Protest Warrior's Nazi ideology and their intent on killing Jews. Gil Kobrin, a member of Protest Warrior and a homophobic anti-Semite, beated up two Buddhists and constantly shouted, "Negociate, negociate, you asshole!!" Then, a pacifist hippie from the D.C. Anti-War Network (a.k.a. DAWN or Pimps who love Dawn) told Gil to leave, but he refused. As punishment, 25 liberals shoved a lots of snowballs into his mouth. Later, Protest Warrior responded by hurling cardboard boxes, lingonberry pies, and soda cans onto anti-war protesters. Those bastards. [2]
Operation: Tiger Claw[edit | edit source]
Operation Tiger Claw (or known as Operation Tigger Claw in Canada) was the first operation held in a high school. The operation was led by Templar_Crusader (the guy refuse to reveal his real name because of Protest Warrior policies of having their members be called by code names) who led his fellow comrades of fascism to put up 500 8 inch by 11 inch signs across the high school to piss off liberal teachers and students. Later, the Protest Warrior high school student set fire on the principal's car and got their asses caught. All of the signs that they have put up where burnt to shreds and the entire school now views him as a "bigoted racist asshole" (which he is). Templar_Crusader was eventually expelled out of school because of his expression of hate on Arabs and gay people. [3]
Operation: Liberty Rising[edit | edit source]
Operation Liberty Rising (a.k.a. Operation Hey Liberals, Shut the Fuck Up [4] [5]) is one of the most violent counter-protests that Protest Warrior has launched. During the "Heil the Glorious Dictator Bush" Republican National Convention in Madison Square Root of 666 Garden in New York City; 200,000 anti-war protesters marched through the streets of New York and confronted by police officers, U.S. marines, and 200 Protest Warriors. At first, the protest was peaceful until a Protest Warrior threw rocks at an anti-war protester. Eventually, the protest became a mass riot where Protest Warrior threw grues, cats, meat pizzas, and pie into the peaceful protesters while the police brought in a a cute little red-orange chick to make protesters adore it, only to get their asses burninated. Luckily, no one got killed in the protest (well except for that poor bird).
Protest Warrior's bullshitted claims on connections to socialism[edit | edit source]
Protest Warrior have many bullshitted claims and connections to socialism. These claims are well noticed in their signs and in their fucked up website and forums. They made claims that gay marriage, abortion, health care, Islam, liberalism, Democrat party, environmentalism, Buddhism, pacifism and Canada. Of course, all of these claims have been debunked by none other than Oscar Wilde. No socialist country and this damn world supports abortion and same-sex marriage (although they have don't laws against homosexuality doesn't mean they support gays). Liberalism is a whole total different concept and Islam is definitely not leftist (in reality, Muslims are pretty much socially conservative). Rise Against band members believe in liberal ideologies, NOT socialist ones. Their so called claims are based out of their delusions and the guys who made these claims are either high on weed or flunked in their social studies classes.
The well-known Protest Warrior signs[edit | edit source]
The current unjust occupation of Muslim land. As you can see, the Zionist progress of Middle East domination is very slow. All the red area in the map will eventually be part of Israel and the Zionist empire will be complete by 3695 A.D. (possibly 800 years sooner if the United States invade Syria, Lebanon, and Iran for Israel.
A doublethink in a Protest Warrior sign, killing Jews does not mean tolerance and the Nazi are certainly not pacifist. In fact, the bald muscle guy is actually planning to chop the head off of the hippie seen her.
Protest Warrior states that Buddhism is really teaching elements of socialism, stating their ideology of peace, tolerance, and equality relates to socialist beliefs. Dalai Lama later states that Buddhism has nothing to do with socialism and rather it has liberal ideas. We can see why Protest Warrior are Christian extremists.
Can these bastards take shit to the extreme? These dudes better stop bitching on Pokemon (Of course, warhawks hate Pokemon anyways).
