User talk:Zip Zip Kanute

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Welcome![edit source]

Hello, Zip Zip Kanute, and thanks for joining Uncyclopedia! Before editing further, please take a gander at our Beginner's Guide. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, check out the following pages:

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If you need help, feel free to ask me on my talk page, ask at the community forum or in the chatroom, or ask an administrator on their talk page. Additionally, our Adopt-a-Noob program can bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply leave a message on an adopter's talkpage to join. I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian!  ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) Proudly bogan 22:35, October 2, 2012 (UTC)

Turn Blue[edit source]

If you add something to your user page and create a signature link, then you will be able to face the Waves of Outrageous Fortune...--Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 12:45, October 3, 2012 (UTC)

User:Zip Zip Kanute/Crabatulance[edit source]

Would you be interested in submitting this to Our first ever writing competition for newbies? If so follow the link and follow the directions. Happy editing :) ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) Proudly bogan 07:56, October 4, 2012 (UTC)

Also, I uploaded that image you are trying to use in your article to the wiki. Use Special:Upload to do this :) ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) Proudly bogan 08:20, October 4, 2012 (UTC)

Bef Soop[edit source]

"Orr chryst… yoov med us that rank bef soop agan ant'ya luv." Michael Flatley

Bef Soop (English: "Beef Soup") is a hot edible liquid developed in Yorkshire after The Second World War in the 'Fight Against Rationing'. It is usually served in small bowels called 'nips, and comes topped with parsley and salt. Participants devour Bef Soop with a special 'Y' shaped spoon made of beef bone and string which allows the 'soop' to cool as they slurp it.

It is now considered a delicacy in many parts of the UK and is most notably championed by entertainment legend and all-round funny man Les Dennis.

--A brown husk in the trousers of information 10:10, October 11, 2012 (UTC)

History[edit source]

The original 'Bef Soop' is thought to have originated in the small town of Plong in East Yorkshire, UK at the turn of last century. It is said to have come 'miraculously to mind' during a football match in which a sunday league footballer, Andy White, famously tripped over a large cube of frozen faeces which was left unsportingly on a football pitch by the opposing team.

--A brown husk in the trousers of information 10:11, October 11, 2012 (UTC)

Recipe Origins[edit source]

Today's recipes aren't radically different to the original recipe used in Andy White's recipe; which made use of a variety of hardy ingredients including salt, beef leg, brown carrots, parsnips, mushroom stock, salt, yap yaps, rust flour, coriander, parsley, salt, little-man's shaving foam and sulpher.

'Bef Soop' is considered a healthy, warming and economical meal for all human beings to enjoy.

'Aye, dat bef soop's a reet tasty treat aft'e wolk up mowntins" World Famous TV Chef Personality Teacher Writer Gorden Ramsey Yes.

It is not recommended for pregnant women or children with high blood pressure.

--A brown husk in the trousers of information 10:11, October 11, 2012 (UTC)

Localisation[edit source]

Over the years, each county in England has adapted Bef Soop to suit it's own preference and has accordingly altered it's name to represent it's own cultural heritage.

'Bef Soop' can be referred to as Bef Soop, Plong, (E. Yorkshire), Long-chin's Mayonnaise, Thill Dilkush (Lancashire), Vin Deisel (Somerset), Lwwlllwllwllennn, n'Drip (Wales), and Nana's Knickers (Essex).

Many countries in western Europe, including Scotland and East Germany, have illegalised the consumption of Bef Soop under the EFSA's recommendation; which claims that it could: "enhance the growth of tumours in various lymph glands and ventricipods found throughout the body".

--A brown husk in the trousers of information 10:11, October 11, 2012 (UTC)

Flavourings & Thickeners[edit source]

All natural flavourings are promoted for all variations of Bef Soop. Although rust flour is no longer available in the UK, it can be imported and shipped from India and the far east. It can also be acquired illegally on the black market.

Artificial Thickener Clods (ATC12-e4) are frequently used as a substitute to Rust Flour in many dishes in the UK, and are currently sold by many major supermarkets and DIY stores throughout Yorkshire and the north east.

--A brown husk in the trousers of information 10:11, October 11, 2012 (UTC)

Popular Culture and Controversy[edit source]

Aforementioned entertainment legend Les Dennis famously cooked 'Bef Soop' live in front of a horrified studio audience on popular cooking program 'Ready Steady Cook' in October 1999.

A record 21,524 complaints were received by the BBC on broadcast of the episode, as home viewers voiced their concerns oafter witnessing the upsetting reactions of world renown pastry chef Ainsley Harriott, and ginger tramp Anthony Worrell Thompson.

Harriot was said to be 'disturbed by the smell' and 'danced around like a lunatic', whilst Thompson: "strugdled to contain his girth" before "viciously vomiting up himself all over his guests".

All-round funny man Les Dennis was seemingly unaffected.

--A brown husk in the trousers of information 10:12, October 11, 2012 (UTC)