User:Wikipedia is still crap
Hello. I am User:Wikipedia is crap. I forgot my password. I am a dumbass.
Who am I?[edit | edit source]
I served in Korea during the Korean War. The experience has made me an expert on Korean history and culture, and it made me hate Korea. That's why I edit Korea related articles on uncyclopedia.
Wikipedia[edit | edit source]
I used to like Wikipedia. I had an acount and knew all the terms like "sock puppet" "POV Fork" etc. I contributed to Wikipedia well. One day, some admin at Wikipedia falsely accused me of being a sock puppet master, and banned me from editing.
My side of the story[edit | edit source]
My "sockpuppets" were impersonators, and a few were friends. The impersonators continued to impersonate me and vandalized the Talk Page of the admin that blocked me and started a war. The war recently spread to Uncyclopedia, where my impersonators created the account Ockenbock. That is not the real Ockenbock.
Ockenbock[edit | edit source]
I do have a small confession to make. Ockenbock wasn't originally mine. A friend lost interest in Ockenbock and I took it over. That's why it changed so dramatically.
Uncyclopedia[edit | edit source]
I have a much better time here.
A brief synopsis of my life, part 1[edit | edit source]
Let's see... I was born in Atlanta, Georgia, early on one frosty morning. In 1928. My father was a pastor and my mother owned a restaurant, which served traditional Southern cuisine: fried okra, fried chicken, fried shrimp, fried pickles, corn fritters, fried catfish, biscuits and gravy, and dark coffee. At the age of 15, my family moved to Area 51. Three years later, I went to college, and graduated with honors. I joined up after graduation. Big mistake. I ended up wasting my prime years in Korea, fighting.
A brief synopsis of my life, part 2: The Korean War[edit | edit source]
I started out as a Second Lieutenant commanding infantry. I first fought at the battle of Inchon. I landed at green beach and I led my tanks to destroy the North Korean positions. As I worked my way north, we encountered fierce resistance. In Seoul, there was intense resistance as we fought street by street. I was wounded twelve separate times. When my tank was blasted by a North Korean, I barely escaped to fight on foot. It was worse near the Yalu. It was cold. Cold like Buddhist hell, which I learned about in North Korea. The horror of the next few years is too much for me to talk about. Perhaps in a month or two.
A brief synopsis of my life, part 3: Curse you, Dick Cheney![edit | edit source]
When I returned from the hell that was the Korean war, I settled in Oregon. To make ends meet, I barrowed 15000 from banks, friends, and family. Using that dough, I opened a hunting resort. The resort was 500 acres of virgin wilderness, surrounded by 70000 volt electric fences and filled with quail. There was a 15 dollar fee to enter, and a 20 fee per kill. The resort was going pretty slow for a quite some time. Until Dick showed up. By that point, I had an African buffalo hunt. Dick shot me and my arms had to be amputated. I was, amazingly, reimbursed by the freaks. My resort grew huge on the money they gave me.
A brief synopsis of my life, part 4: Vietnam[edit | edit source]
When the draft was instated, I used my money and connections to get a National Guard post, thus avoiding service in Vietnam luckily wasn't drafted.
Religion[edit | edit source]
Being the son of a pastor, I grew up Christian. The war in Korea was so brutal, I became an atheist.
My interests[edit | edit source]
A sample of my favorite articles[edit | edit source]
My old wikipedia account[edit | edit source]
Before the blasted wikipedians blocked me, this [1] was my user page.
Why is it different?[edit | edit source]
I was so traumatized by the Korean war that I tried to create a psuedo-story of my life. That's why it's different.
My UnPhilosophy[edit | edit source]
I believe that it is preferable to have backround knowledge than not to.
Remember: WIkipedia is still crap