User:Turb0-Sunrise/Turb0pedia/US Department of Penile Extrication
The United States Department of Penile Extrication (DOPE) is an executive department of the United States Government primarily responsible for managing incidents in which the President, Vice President, or other White House officials get their penises stuck in various objects. Founded in 1987 after the Third Ronald Reagan Pickle Jar Incident, this department has handled dozens of cases and saved countless lives, and is considered the most important department in the government.
History[edit | edit source]
On May 8, 1987, at 3:00am, while on a diplomatic trip to the White House kitchen, President Ronald Reagan tripped and fell, getting his penis stuck in a pickle jar. After several attempts, Vice President George H.W. Bush managed to pull it out. According to Bush, this was the third such incident since Reagan took office.