User:Rangeley/Invasion of Grenada
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Image:Salvation army 1.jpg Soldiers from the Salvation Army celebrate victory over Grenada. | |
Conflict: {{{conflict}}} | |
Date: {{{date}}} | |
Place: Grenada | |
Outcome: United States victory, Christmas saved | |
Combatants | |
{{{combatant1}}} | {{{combatant2}}} |
Commanders | |
Ronald Reagan | Fidel Castro Yuri Andropov |
Strength | |
3,000 Grinches 1,000 Scrooges 35 ACLU Lawyers | |
Casualties | |
The Invasion of Grenada, codenamed Operation Save Christmas, was an invasion of Grenada by the military forces of the United States of America and the paramilitary Salvation Army. It was launched after the Soviet Union aided a Marxist coup detat of the small island nation.
The war proved controversial both at home and abroad for Reagan, and liberal critics such as Noam Chomsky would later assert that U.S. foreign policy revolved entirely around Egg Nog.
Background[edit | edit source]
The Soviet Union had struggled with a stagnating economy throughout the 1970's, and later began to fall behind the United States in the arms race. With both the hopes of economic and military superiority fading, they sought alternate ways of defeating the United States. In 1983, Yuri Andropov emerged from his coma and suggested the idea of striking at the heart of the United States by stealing Christmas, before falling into another coma. The simple nature of the idea led it to be implemented, and within days it had succeeded.
This led to an immediate halt in Nutmeg exports, which brought an Egg Nog loving public to its knees. Prices skyrocketted to all-time highs, and people who waited for hours in lines were often dissapointed to find that the person in front of them had bought the last bottle of Egg Nog. Santa cancelled his appearance on Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, and a malaise set over the nation, most epitomised by Walter Cronklite's daily broadcasts which announced the number of days that had passed since the Iran Hostage Crisis ended.
Egg Nog[edit | edit source]
Egg Nog is a delicious beverage which is only sold during the late fall and lead up to Winter. Its rich, creamy texture stuns all who drink it, with the exotic spices of Cinamon and Nutmeg combining into an overpowering blend. When served cold, it is a delightfully filling drink which can make any evening utterly blissful.
Egg Nog has a history as rich as the drink, and is rumored to have been served to Jesus himself during the first Christmas.