User:Psychotic Spartan/Part 1

Fantastic, <insert name here>, you've found yourself on this page. Great. Wasting time now, ain't we. Nothing to do but read my incoherent writings.

The Badass Test

If you're badass you'll meet every one of these requisites:

• You are unhurt by emotional pain: your own son could die, and you wouldn't care.
• You're hung like a bull: no explanation needed.
• You have a pair of bloody gloves laying around.
• You've met Jewish God and gave him the finger for no reason.
• You've had sex before (can be male or female, nobody cares).
• You own a bowie knife (from Rambo), or a gun.
• AAA AAAA AAA AAAAA AA AAAAA AA AAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAA.

Now that You're Badass...

You have to survive the tests of endurance. Each test is far more deadly, enduring, and impossible than the last. If you were to survive all 3 of them you would be a true psycho. In fact you could even award yourself the (yet to exist) {{Template:Psycho}} template.

Test 1

You have to break into the nearest car sales-place and steal a car. Not the big pink clown car, the dark green Camaro. It's fast-like a bullet. Now you must drive right into the nearest Police Department, smack a cop in the face with your dick, and ejaculate onto a sleeping prisoner.

If you survive this without getting your ass kicked by the prisoner or being arrested by the cops then you're ready for Test 2.

Test 2

Now you must kill somebody. Doesn't even matter how, so long as you use your penis as a weapon (why do you think god gave you one?).

If you somehow survived the victim's angry relatives than you're ready for the 3rd test.

Test 3

Here's the toughest one yet, you must run into an airplan screaming "Alalalalallalahh!" at the top of your longs and piss on the co-pilot, just for showing up to work today. And then you must jump off the plane using a stolen parachute.

Holy dick, you survived. Well, you are a badass...and a psycho. Congradulations you win nothing, go get a hooker or something.

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