User:Ninja Kow

“What the bloody hell is a Ninja Kow?”

~ Oscar Wilde on the Ninja Kow

“Moo”

~ Ninja Kow on the above quote

Bio

What is a Ninja Kow?

On some nights, when the moon is high in the sky, the elusive Ninja Kow can be seen... but never caught.

Also, you can leave some cheesy-bacon fries in an open area, that'll get 'em too.

WARNING!

Be sure to check the surroundings for ninja-traps and kow-pies in your designated kow watching area!

The Epic

The story of the Ninja has been revealed in a recently unearthed relic! These chips are covered in an ancient illegible scrawl known as Wingdings. It will take our experts some time to translate them, but we'll make sure to keep this updated.

The Beginning

As it has always been, Kows do not simply start as Ninjas (see quotes above). They must be trained in the Ninja arts!

Abandoned and alone, the Kow wandered the countryside until he met his future teachers, Matt Parker and Trey Stone. The dynamic duo trained the Kow, creating a master at causing mental anguish to his enemies.

Friends & Rivals

On his travels, the first foes the Kow encountered was a group of five. They eventually worked out their differences, and that's how the Kow came to know Graham Chapman, John Cleese, Michael Palin, Eric Idle, Terry Jones, and Terry Gilliam. Through this new-found alliance, the seven discovered two things:

• They were seven times as annoying as any of them were alone
• They couldn't stand each other for more than fifteen consecutive minutes.

So they parted ways, having made a large impact on each other.

Also he met some homo in the woods, and had an epic Haiku battle until a terrifying rogue scared them both away.

Hard Times

In 1867 he was caught stealing some pasta, and was forced to live in the wild or suffer "death by grue." He remained in the wild for 20 years living only on water and kitten huffing.

Powers

• The Kow requires large amounts of magical nectar in order to lift his massive bovine body during extensive bouts of acrobatics, stunts and sword fights.
• From reading a magical tome of wonder, the Kow has learned many amazing tricks.

This User is too Damn Sexy! If you saw this user it's possible that you might fall to the ground and worship him/her, or spontaneously combust from a sex drive overload.

PIECE OF CRAP WARNING!

This page is a piece of crap. The author(s) acknowledge this.

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This user is a Ninja, with dominion over everything totally sweet.

I am an assassin, and can kill you anywhere you go from in the shadows. Fear me!