User:Methamphetamine/UnPoetia: The 12 Demented Days of Christmas
So you're wondering if some idiot really had the money to give over a thousand items between Christmas and Epiphany Eve. Errr... he didn't. Instead, let me take you into a normal (sic) city involving normal (sic) people on the 12 days of this horrendous religious holiday.
On the second day of Christmas, Satan gave to me:
Two alcoholics,
And a sane Atheist on a tree!
On the third day of Christmas, Satan gave to me:
Three French bi[sexual]s,
Two alcoholics,
And a sane Atheist on a tree!
On the fourth day of Christmas, Satan gave to me:
Four shot birds,
Three French bi[sexual]s,
Two alcoholics,
And a sane Atheist on a tree!
On the fifth day of Christmas, Satan gave to me:
Five... million Russians
Four shot birds,
Three French bi[sexual]s,
Two alcoholics,
And a sane Atheist on a tree!
On the sixth day of Christmas, Satan gave to me:
Six greedy socialists
Five... million Russians
Four shot birds,
Three French bi[sexual]s,
Two alcoholics,
And a sane Atheist on a tree!
On the seventh day of Christmas, Satan gave to me:
Seven hundred carolists
Six greedy socialists
Five... million Russians
Four shot birds,
Three French bi[sexual]s,
Two alcoholics,
And a sane Atheist on a tree!
On the eighth day of Christmas, Satan gave to me:
Eight Christmas 'busters
Seven hundred carolists
Six greedy socialists
Five... million Russians
Four shot birds,
Three French bi[sexual]s,
Two alcoholics,
And a sane Atheist on a tree!
On the ninth day of Christmas, Satan gave to me:
Nine Jews killing people
Eight Christmas 'busters
Seven hundred carolists
Six greedy socialists
Five... million Russians
Four shot birds,
Three French bi[sexual]s,
Two alcoholics,
And a sane Atheist on a tree!
On the tenth day of Christmas, Satan gave to me:
Ten [thousand] conglomerates closing
Nine Jews killing people
Eight Christmas 'busters
Seven hundred carolists
Six greedy socialists
Five... million Russians
Four shot birds,
Three French bi[sexual]s,
Two alcoholics,
And a sane Atheist on a tree!
On the eleventh day of Christmas, Satan gave to me:
Eleven major shootings
Ten [thousand] conglomerates closing
Nine Jews killing people
Eight Christmas 'busters
Seven hundred carolists
Six greedy socialists
Five... million Russians
Four shot birds,
Three French bi[sexual]s,
Two alcoholics,
And a sane Atheist on a tree!
On the twelfth day of Christmas, Satan gave to me:
Twelve stupid givers
Eleven major shootings
Ten [thousand] conglomerates closing
Nine Jews killing people
Eight Christmas 'busters
Seven hundred carolists
Six greedy socialists
Five... million Russians
Four shot birds,
Three French bi[sexual]s,
Two alcoholics,