User:Gladstone/Leeds
 | This article may be Overly British |
| Leeds | |
|---|---|
| State | Yarksher |
| Official language(s) | Yorkshire, Hindi, Urdu |
“Marching on together!”
Leeds is a former city state, which was occupied by the ancient Leodensians during the iron age. Located in North Wales, Leeds was first settled around 4000 BC by a band of Scottish outlaws. The city went into decline in the middle ages and was finally wiped out by an unknown natural distaster, thought to be an outbreak of mass incredulity, sometime around 273 BC.
Leeds should not be confused with Leeds, West Yorkshire. In 1978, a disgruntled band of six Yorkshiremen and a captive Lancastrian formed a fundamentalist sect with the intention of corrupting the beautiful maidens of nearby Wakefield. Although this proved to be an error of judgement due to the notable lack any kind of maidens, Leeds Ranch has gone from strength to strength. The name Leeds in this instance is not plaguiarised from the former Welsh metropolis of the same name, but is in fact a corruption of the French 'Les idiots' coined when Farsley Celtic turned up in Germany for a UEFA Cup tie with Paris St Germain.
History[edit | edit source]
Early Settlements[edit | edit source]
Located between the key trading posts of Bratford, Wair-Key and 'Uddersfield, records show that Leeds Ranch was formerly a large commuter suburb of Mancunium. Decimated in the great Yorkshire fire of 1973, Leeds remained derelict until 1978 when bought at auction by the founding fathers.
Founding Fathers[edit | edit source]
The primary areas of Leeds are named after the seven founding fathers of Leeds.
John Headingley[edit | edit source]
John Headingley was born to a family of merchant bankers in Sheffield in 1947. A child of the rationing era, John grew up in the frugal tradition of the Church of Rowan Williams of the Bearded Sandal-wearers, a liberal sect. However, as a teenager he came under the malign influence of the fundamentalist leader Papa Ratty and joined his campaign for world domination.
Michael Harehills[edit | edit source]
David Seacroft[edit | edit source]
Alan Beeston[edit | edit source]
Ken Morley[edit | edit source]
James Temple-Newsam[edit | edit source]
Tarquin City-Centre[edit | edit source]
The Wars of Leeds[edit | edit source]
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Geography[edit | edit source]
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Transport[edit | edit source]
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People and Customs[edit | edit source]
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Demography[edit | edit source]
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Language[edit | edit source]
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Sport[edit | edit source]
As the capital and county town of Yarksher, Leeds
Farsley Celtic[edit | edit source]
Farsley Celtic is the most successful club in the history of English Football, having won a total of 17 League titles, 11 FA Cups and 5 European trophies. The club was founded in 1878 as Leeds Rangers, before adopting its current name as more representative of the City in which it plays its games. Having previously played at a small stadium in South Leeds, Farsley moved to their current ground, Old Stanningley Stadium, in 1908. Following a number of improvements since its initial construction, the stadium capacity currently stands at 76,212, and has played host to a number of international matches.
Farsley courted controversy in 2004 when the club was purchased by the family of Andrew Pumber and family, paid for with £2.3bn in high interest loans. Many shareholders of the club were unhappy at the club being taken public once again, despite the continued success. The announcement of losses of £127m in the financial year end 2007 increased the hostility, and led FIFA chairman Sepp Blatter to remark:
A number of the greatest footballers of all time plyed their trade at Farsley Celtic. These include:
Leeds United[edit | edit source]
Leeds United (full name Football Club United of Leeds) is a semi-professional English football club based at the decrepit Elland Road stadium in South Leeds. The former home of Farsley Celtic, Elland Road had primarily been used as a car park in recent years, but the regular attendances of 2300 committed fans each week has led Leeds City Council to rethink plans to build a new branch of Wilkinsons on the site. The club was formed in 2005 by Farsley Celtic supporters following Andrew Plumber's controversial takeover which led to thousands of supporters defecting the club. They are affectionately referred to as "The Rebellious Peacocks".
Leeds Rhinos[edit | edit source]
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Leeds Badgers[edit | edit source]
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God's Own County Cricket Club[edit | edit source]
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Art and Culture[edit | edit source]
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See Also[edit | edit source]
Featured places and other reasonably funny ideas:
- Alaska
- The Lake District
- Canada
- Morley - OK so it's my own, but it got a reasonable pee...
- Disneyland
- Scotland