User:Assholeism101/UnNews:Dallas mayor makes thinly veiled political power move

This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation.

24 March 2011

DALLAS, Texas -- Earlier this, the Mayor of Dallas Texas decided that it would be best for his career if he made his wife look like a crazy bi-polar bitch, possibly in the attempt to secure the highly coveted unfortunate husband vote. Supposedly earlier this year, during a seemingly innocuous argument regarding kitchen aprons, the Mayors wife decided to remove a chainsaw from the one of the many weapon filled drawers, and proceeded to attack him with it. The Mayor immediately called one of his many home-boys in the police, and began an interview intended for Faux News to air in January. In the interview, the mayor is heard telling said home-boy about the encounter:

“ That Crazy ho' gon' kill me if I go back there! ”

This has undoubtedly also secured him to coveted abusive husband vote as it is obvious that more went on than an argument regarding aprons. It is unknown whether the will make a bid at the presidency in 2012.