Uncyclopedia:The MMORPG

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Uncyclopedia is the worst

~ Critical consensus on Uncyclopedia:The MMORPG
The cover of Uncyclopedia: The MMORPG depicts the dreaded potato monster, a dire creature second only to the pervasive grue.

Uncyclopedia:The MMORPG is an online role-playing game released by Gizzard Inc. in 2005. The game takes place within the mythical kingdom of Uncyclopedia, a wartorn digital land contested by two major factions: the Vandals and the Sysopians. Players have the choice to play as a member of either faction, or even begin as unaffiliated with either party, eventually joining one as each side attempts to seduce the character to its own way of doing things. The game is revolutionary in that, unlike most other modern RPG games, players battle using their wit rather than their strength in arms.

Along with its primary roleplaying aspect, the game features a "PVP" battleground where players are pit against each other, their satirical output judged by their peers.

Uncyclopedia:The MMORPG also contains two expansion packs, called The Benson Crusade and Wrath of The Drama King. A third expansion, Catastrophe, is soon due to be released. In the new expansion, the servers all crash simultaneously, and players must unite to save their beloved land from falling into oblivion. Uncyclopedia:The MMORPG once held the Guinness World Record for most subscribed MMORPG, but the record was soon stricken when the record keepers realized what a stupid category that was. With a userbase of over 30 million people (although nearly all are inactive or unregistered users) the game holds a whopping 99% of the MMORPG market.

Development[edit source]

Uncyclopedia:The MMORPG was the brainchild of Jonathan Huang, a Japanese engineering student. Like everyone else from East Asia, Huang was an avid gamer and a regular on the professional Starcraft circuit. One day, while defending the Confederacy from the nefarious Zergs, Huang suddenly realized that pursuing a career in playing video games was a waste of time. However, instead of getting a sensible job and becoming a responsible member of society, he decided that he would pursue a career in videogame development. With an inexplicable fortune of $4 million gained from battling virtual aliens in a virtual galaxy, and with no one to deter him from his diabolical schemes, Huang began work on what would later become Uncyclopedia:The MMORPG.

Gameplay and Lore[edit source]

As with other MMORPGs, players create a character avatar, generally with an overwrought and/or nonsensical name. Players have a choice to join either the totalitarian Sysopian Empire, or the rebel Vandals. Each faction seeks to undermine the other and gain total control of the empire. In the game's history, the kingdon of Uncyclopedia was conquered and brought under one rule by Emperor Chronarion and Lieutenant Stillwaters. Shortly after their conquest, they both disappeared under mysterious circumstances. Despite this, the realm knew peace for many years. Many generations later, a headstrong mage named Nintendor Ules opened a portal to another dimension, allowing the fiendish Bensonites to invade the empire. Under their leader's ruthless command, the Bensonites nearly conquered the Sysopian Empire in a vicious conflict known as the First War. But the Sysopians soon banded together and reclaimed their former lands, ultimately sending BENSON back into the Twisting Nether whence he came. The Bensonites, known to the Sysopians as "Vandals", were now free of their former leader's demonic control. Forced to fight for survival in a world that despised them, the Vandals sailed across the sea to forge a kingdom of their own. The world of Uncyclopedia remains beset by chaos and conflict, with both factions clashing on a near constant basis.

Expansions[edit source]

BENSON in demonic form

There have been three expansion packs released for Uncyclopedia:The MMORPG. All of them suck.

The Benson Crusade[edit source]

In the first expansion, players travel through the inter-dimensional portal to a wartorn realm known as Troutland where BENSON's demonic CULT OF ALL CAPS still holds sway. Players must deal with evil demons, deadly environs, and the general annoyance of being constantly screamed at in all caps. Ultimately, players face BENSON himself, but BENSON is impossible to defeat because BENSON is better than you. At best, BENSON deems your puny existence worthy of his mercy and kicks your sorry ass back through the portal. Despite the anticlimactic ending, The Benson Crusade remains the game's most popular expansion.

Wrath of the Drama King[edit source]

Catastrophe[edit source]

In Catastrophe, Uncyclopedia's server crashes, leaving the kingdom in a state of disarray. Players from both factions must unite to save their beloved realm from being overtaken by the malevolent dragon, Wikia who seeks to spread his agenda of littering the kingdom with stupid advertisements. The Sysopian emperor also gets a bad case of psoriasis and players must spend half the game searching for his medication.

Gizzcon[edit source]

Every year Gizzard Inc. celebrates Gizzcon, where Uncyclopedia fans from around the world gather to socialize with fellow players and learn about future developments to the game. Players get the rare chance to talk to Uncyclopedia's developers one on one and ask them questions. Generally, such questions are mocked/ignored. Seen here are two Uncyclopedia administrators not giving a shit about this man's question:

Reception and Criticism[edit source]

Uncyclopedia is the worst