Uncyclopedia:Space dicks from your anus
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Space dicks from your anus are no laughing matter. Here at Uncyclopedia we take a very strict stance against extra-terrestrial genitalia invading our air space. If in the course of editing you witness a flying penis or anything resembling a flying penis, please report it to the administrators immediately. Failure to comply will result in a trial to determine whether the incident constitutes aiding and abetting of a comedy criminal. The trial will not be fair and you will be found guilty and sentenced to infinite years in Ban Jail.
How to spot a space dick from your anus[edit source]
Space dicks from your anus are known to be masters of stealth and disguise. Fortunately for all aspiring writers of comedy, they are only known for this on their home planet, whose inhabitants have no eyes or ears, being that they are giant penises. To a human buttsucker they should be easy to spot, even if they happen to be wearing a novelty mustache or hooded cloak. Because they are giant penises.
If you or someone you love are accosted by a space penis, you are advised to lie prone and feign mild arousal, allowing them to probe you until their work is finished. The information they gather will be minimal collateral damage compared to the damage they could cause to your anus if you fight back, as they are strong and known to go into an intense berserker-like rage if their sexual desires are not met.
Protecting your articles from space dicks from your anus[edit source]
All new users are given an aerosol can filled with anti-dick-juice upon registration. It is customary to apply a full coat of said juice to any newly-written article upon its completion. Failure to comply in this instance will result in death. We'll fucking kill you. When your aerosol can becomes empty, refills can be requested from the administrators for a small fee of asking your friends to do the same.
Also it is advised to not write about the space dicks from your anus. When portrayed in a comedic light they are known to destroy entire planets, as they are a species lacking not only in humor but also in humility or compassion.
Notable space dicks to be on the lookout for[edit source]
The chief commander of the space dicks from your anus goes by the name Mr. Winkler. He is particularly dangerous and also particularly easy to distinguish, due to his fondness for wearing leather jackets. He's a pretty nice guy though otherwise. Just don't get in a conversation with him about, like, your anal glands or something, cause he really doesn't like to talk about that kind of stuff.
General F. Price, the military commander of the space dicks from your anus, enjoys long walks on the beach and sucking santorum out of a glass ashtray, because he's a weird little freak. Seriously, fuck that guy. Just ignore him and he'll go away.
Anyway the point here is, the general reader can suck my space dick from your anus.