Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/negima
negima[edit source]
hello 16:35, 4 March 2009 (UTC)
- Just being out there, I'm relatively new here on Uncyclopedia, and this is my first article. Other articles I tried were huffed for some reason. This one is the only survivor (based on how stuff that is in there). Otherwise, it's a piece of crap article that needs much help.
- Negi-sensei! One of the best mangas I've discovered this year so far. Anyway, I'm too busy to give a review. --
Back off, I call this one!Nm, I thought it was about something else.--Smokin' Cheddar BBQ: The King of the Triangular Snackfoods 22:45, 4 March 2009 (UTC)- Seesh. -- 18:03, 6 March 2009 (UTC)
16:52, 4 March 2009 (UTC)
- Negi-sensei! One of the best mangas I've discovered this year so far. Anyway, I'm too busy to give a review. --
Nachlader will review this article. |
Humour: | 0 | Okay. Okay... No other way of getting around this. I am a devoted Negima! fan, and erstwhile a comedic idea has never occured to me before in regard to this fantastic manga from Akamatsu-san, I'm sure I could conjure a far more decent article with only three letters.
This really is deserving of it's pile o' crap template, I'm sorry to say, I don't like having to use words like that in a review. But, there is a way that this article could be improved beyond that point. |
Concept: | 1 | Suffers a lot, as I can say that there is very little people who visit this site that have even heard of Negima!. This in itself does not usually warrant an article, since so few readers will come round for it.
The text... is clustered with crap. It's incredibly uninteresting, random, typical, boring and dull. It sounds like it should be exciting because of all the wayward glances into the First, consider renaming the article from Negima to the full name of the manga: Negima! Magister Negi Magi. This can be done via the 'move' tab at the top of the article. Using the full name of the subject shows effort. If the article on the United States of America was simply called the United States, it would hardly show professionalism, would it? It doesn't fully tell what the reader is in for when they click the link, either. Remember that it is Negima!, not Negima!?. If you ask me, I believe the best way to go about writing any anime/manga article is to adopt the common factors of the manga. Not to extremes obviously (extremes in any case are never good anyway). If the manga has attractive females in it, I would add multiple pictures of them in the article, each with captions that present pathetic reasons to include the images into the article. To taunt the illustration mark in Negima!'s name, I would put a '!' at the end of each headline (and maybe italicise each one). For the actual content, do not use random humour. Just give a short, straightforward, yet light-hearted look at the subject, there is no point in extracting a long article, because as I've said before, not many people have even heard of this manga. Do not use one liners, try and knit them into the article. Cut down the number of sections, get rid of the counter template, do not put random quotes all over the place. Also, the article lacks an introduction. At least explain what the subject is briefly, before ridiculing the idea of a 10 year old being in charge of a high school class in Japan. Articles about pieces of media, films, videogames, books are hard to write funny articles about. Anime/manga is indubitably included with that. It is very hard a subject to make genuine humour out of. This is why the concept score is low. |
Prose and formatting: | 2 | The only misdemeanour missing from this horrible, horrible mess is a constant spray of poor English writing skills. Although even good English skills could raise the score any higher.
The red links cause my eyes to bleed, and they don't link to anywhere anyway. Do not use strike-throughs constantly, and don't use the censor tags at all (this is no longer funny in articles, nobody cares what's behind the black code). Also remove the embedded YouTube videos. This is one part of my review that I can ascertain is merely just my opinion, but I believe embedded YouTube videos to be entirely unnecessary. You want your readers to... read. Not go off watching something that they could've done from a million other sites. Get rid of all the templates. I realise some of them are there because of the poor quality of the article, but that can be dealt with at least. The quotes at the top are also useless and meme-spoilt. When a meme is popular, it isn't funny anymore. |
Images: | 2 | Some credit due here. Three images supplied. However, this is nowhere near enough for the length of the article. They are badly placed, aligned only to one part of the article and nowhere else.
As per my suggestion earlier: add more pictures of the attractive girls in this manga. However, do not add shitty captions such as "looks can be very deceiving, she gots 1337 sw0rdz0rz skillz". Instead, be nonchalant. Mention what their skill in school maybe, adding a risqué touch to it: "Nodoka Miyazaki, class member no. 27, is the school librarian, dealing with the hottest books on offer". It can be hard, but it's better than making a half-hearted and poor caption like the ones you've already installed. Also, add an image of one of the covers from Negima! (preferably vol. 1) at the very top of the article. This will instantly familiarise the reader what kind of subject the article is about. It is also a caption-joke opportunity. |
Miscellaneous: | 1 | Average'd. |
Final Score: | 6 | You're tackling very hard grounds here. It's very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very likely this isn't an idea that will be ever featured, but it can still hold it's own little humour for the fans, such as myself, of the manga. Be ruthlessly simple. Try not to stretch the article that far. Not long ago, I created an article called Jerkcity, which is based on the webcomic of the same name. I could've tried to stretch that article, but it would've done nothing. Not many readers have even heard of Jerkcity, so I made the article short and self-referential. The same could nearly be applied here.
You were lucky to come across a reviewer who loves Negima!, let's say. Good luck and there are other opinions available. |
Reviewer: | -- | 14:10, 8 March 2009 (UTC)
- The review is somewhat harsh as far as the score is concerned, but I agree with everything you say, Nachlader. -Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 15:34, 8 March 2009 (UTC)
- Scores schmores. Advice all the way. -- 16:01, 8 March 2009 (UTC)