Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/The USA versus the primitive Taliban (featuring Arnold Schwarzenegger)

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The USA versus the primitive Taliban [edit source]

90s Kid21 03:17, December 31, 2010 (UTC)

I'll get this one. --Wanna see a magic trick? 20:00, January 2, 2011 (UTC)
Ya know what? I'll just do this now. --Wanna see a magic trick? 20:03, January 2, 2011 (UTC)
Humour: 9 I gotta say, this article is funny shit. But there are a couple things that need to be fixed up:

Some of the time it's kinda hard to understand what Arnold Schwarzenegger is trying to say. Namely the first and second thing he says. Now I understand that this is part of the joke, and I think that's great. I just think you should make it a bit easier to tell what he's trying to say.

I also think it's kinda hard in places to understand the story the pictures are trying to tell. More on this in the image section.

Concept: 9 Wonderful concept! A picture book of sorts. I wrote a picture book, it's up for VFH right now, and doing quite well! So that just shows you that picture books are well taken by the uncyc. community.
Prose and formatting: 10 I was very conflicted what I should score this section. Seeing as there are barely any words in this article at all. And even where there are words, they are grammatically incorrect. That being said, that was of course part of the joke. And seeing as it is part of the joke, I gave this a ten.
Images: 8 As I said before, it's kinda hard in places to understand the story the pictures are trying to tell. The first one is at the part right after Arnold Schwarzenegger says "Remember well to talk this tale of the USA versus the primitive Taliban towards each and all of your classmates. Now get out!" then you show a plane, and then school children. And I'm not sure, but I think that was supposed be the kid telling his class about the tale of the USA versus the primitive Taliban. If so, I think you should have a picture of a kid giving a speech in between the "Remember well to talk this tale of the USA versus the primitive Taliban towards each and all of your classmates. Now get out!" image and the File:Raptor1.jpg image. Maybe this one, this one, or this one. But it's up to you.


The other place is that one place where Arnold Schwarzenegger says "Ha! Not within your dreams. Fuck to you, asshole." And has his gun pointed at the sky. Then the plane has the fire coming out the back. Well I think that was supposed to be Arnold Schwarzenegger shooting the plane down. If so, I think you should have a bullet flying thru the air in between the "Ha! Not within your dreams. Fuck to you, asshole." Image and the File:Jet on fire.png image. Maybe this one? Again, it's up to you.

I also think this image is useless. But if you could get one of a pilot pumping his fist in success. Maybe a moving gif? Or it doesn't even have to be moving. Just a thought.

Miscellaneous: 9 Your scores averaged. By the way, I wanted to tell you, I liked the thing where after shooting a plane into the twin towers Arnold Schwarzenegger says "Whoops, not again! Oh well, shit happens."
Final Score: 45 So ya... Great article. I really love it, and can't wait to see you guys work on it.
Reviewer: --Wanna see a magic trick? 23:55, January 2, 2011 (UTC)
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