Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Microsoft (reresubmit)

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Microsoft

LOLsupreme 18:04, 29 August 2008 (UTC)

Humour:	8	You came with an axe to grind and ground it very well. My only suggestion would be to check over the whole article for consistency...and switch "Micro-The-Fucking-Best BITCHES" to Microshit, as you refer to it further down.
Concept:	7	Definitely adequate, but I would probably try to merge the History and Business model sections.
Prose and formatting:	2	The comments in orange boxes are an eyesore as is the Errors section. Also, the grammar needs a thorough review; I found several instances of 'a' when it should have been 'an', a missing 'which', and repeat 'off' in a brief skim.
Images:	5	Pretty much every image got a smile and they all seem relevant, but it seems like a bit of overkill. Like I said before, the Errors section needs cleaned up. Also, having an image on the left side of the page might balance it out a bit.
Miscellaneous:	9	for potential.
Final Score:	31	Potentially excellent article that I think could just use a little cleaning up.
Reviewer:	PaddyAtkinson 23:30, 29 October 2008 (UTC)

Drive-by comment: Just thought I'd add: it definitely feels too listy. See UN:LIST for a few reasons why listy articles don't tend to be too popular - you might want to consider looking at your lists to see if any of them can be re-worked into prose sections instead. Also, as Paddy says, there are wayyy too many images, it feels like overkill. OK, they're fairly amusing, but too many images put a lot of people off, so allow yourself the luxury of keeping your favourites and be ruthless with the others. Perhaps find other pages they can go if you don't want to lose them altogether. --UU - natter 10:04, Oct 31