Uncyclopedia:Featured articles/September 4

Aristocrats are a grouping of people who are thought to be the highest social class in a population. They are typically above the general populace but below the monarch, although generally speaking most aristocrats don't mind who they are on top of, or indeed beneath.

Throughout history, nobles have commanded tribute in the form of cash, labour, crop yield and other despicable acts of submission from commoners. In some countries, the local lord could impose restrictions on such a commoner's movements, religion or sexuality; a power he took advantage of without a second's thought. From the Middle Ages onwards, aristocrats have always had a need for hapless peasants desperate to earn a quick half-a-crown by taking part in the family's sadistic rituals. (Full article...)