Uncyclopedia:Business/HYPERiON Technologies
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HYPERiON Technologies. Awesomeness redefined. 
[edit source]
About[edit source]
HYPERiON Technologies is a global hub for techies to show off their mad skillz (Z to know we mean what we say) at making stuff. By 'stuff' I mean gunz (and yet another Z to know we also have mad modding skillz), hardware, uh, stuff, and everything techy (and cool). Just don't mess up. And no, we don't make game or video systems. No and not stereos. Maybe some time in the future we'll make computers but it's not our point of focus right now.
Employees[edit source]
- RaTCHeT (Owner and MANager. No salary 'cause there's no bank account yet)
- Nobody else. If you want to join in, visit the talk page. Unfortunately you won't get salary until we've got a permission from the folks at the central bank to make us a bank account.
Products[edit source]
(PLEASE NOTE: Prices are quoted in U.S. dollars. Sorry, but beans are no longer accepted.)
Handheld/Worn Hardware
PSDP: $599
Magnogrip Bracelet: $14.99
Pocket Microscope: $9.99
LED Gloves: $14.99
Survival Bracelet: $19.99
Digital Wi-Fi Detector $49.99
Cybertool 41: $74.99
Intelliscanner: $129.99
BUGLabs BUG: $999
Thermohawk $39.99
Hidden Camera Detector $19.99
BLUalert Bluetooth Bracelet: $49.99
Misc. Warfare
Gun Vending Machine: $49,999 (Incl. guns)
Combat Bot: $14,999
Ammo Vending Machine: $24,999 (Incl. ammo)
Med-kit Vending Machine: $19,999 (Incl. supplies)
Medical Bot: $9,999
Mulciber MK2: $4,999
Outrider: $29,999
Guns and stuff
SPR10.W Angry Death: $2036
KKA250 Hostile Bitch: $25,527
CR Combat Destroyer: $150,363
BLR.W Double Repeater: $903
RWL270.W Evil Nidhogg: $1,660,378
LB1170.G Crimson Invader: $46,075
PPZ20.G Crimson Sniper: $5824
Lady Finger: $98
ZX10 Lightning Death: $1121
TD440 Malevolent Bitch: $507,475
TMP2.G Cold Torment: $355
TD340.W Red Bitch: $74049
RF4 Wicked Invader: $3407
BLR Substandard Repeater: $308
The SPY: $2595
The Sentinel: $1859
TEK230 Violent SMG: $1003
Tornado Grenade
Shock Longbow Grenade Mod (x4): $350
Notes[edit source]
Remember, Techy n' cool.