UnNews:Usain Bolt Credits Win to Michael Richards

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
UnNews Logo Potato.png This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation.

17 August 2008


Jamaican sprinter has credited his World Record smashing win at the Beijing Olympics to his inspirational trainer and coach, Michael Richards.[edit | edit source]

Bolt, seeing a picture of Richards being held by one of his trainers, busts out the speed. He saw that cracka on YouTube and wants none of it.

Usain Bolt, Olympic Gold medallist, World Record holder, and McNugget enthusiast, has credited his recent record smashing run to his coach and trainer, Michael Richards. Richards, a former Calvin Klein model and current spokesperson for the KKK, has confirmed that he was a major part of Bolts' training team, but in an informal capacity only.

"I saw a nigger and chased his ass with my noose and bedsheets, but goddamn that nigger was fast!" - Richards

Richards was unable to attend the Olympics, being banned from Beijing and China for suspected Human Rights violations, but was able to watch the record breaking run on his TV while shaking his noose and bedsheets at the screen.

On being asked if his motivational techniques were involved in Michael Phelps' performance, Richards stated "Well he looked Jewish to me."

Richards in his coaching attire.


Sources[edit | edit source]


Retrieved from "https://en.uncyclopedia.co/w/index.php?title=UnNews:Usain_Bolt_Credits_Win_to_Michael_Richards&oldid=3259225"