UnNews:The Bowels of Hell open at The Root of All Evil
This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation. |
29 November 2006
UnNews Audio (file info) | |
Listen to this story! |
Persian Gulf, The Bowels of Hell opened today at The Root of All Evil, the popular tourist destination located on the modern-day shoreline north of the original site of the Garden of Eden (now submerged under the Gulf waters). The BBQ Grill sit-down restaurant celebrated by offering all visitors a free drink and sundae with their first purchase of any special meal.
The restaurant has a number of specials to offer, cooked by Eastern Food expert Behsel "Bub" De ville. Bub has agreed to spend 3 months as head chef before returning to his other restaurant/pub. There are a total of 12 workers now, each with a smile on their face as they work away on their assigned tasks. There's help wanted right now, as the homely eat-in drew in big crowds for those clamoring for a taste of one of the special meals.
Among the popular menu choices are the Satanists Shrimp Sampler, Fiery French fries, The 666 sirloin snafu' (6 $6 6oz. sirloin steaks) and the prime desserts round up a poll in the restaurants most liked foods. Most popular dessert as of now is the The Seven Circles of Chocolate, a cake with each ring getting smaller but richer in chocolate flavor. The food piles up high, and the kids' menu comes with a free* toy pitchfork to help reach for more food when the plate runs out. Gerry the Gremlin is the current mascot, who performs dozens of silly actions to keep the tots happy.
There are plans to expand the grill already, and since the food is already cooked via geothermal power the eatery shall branch off underground, with talks of a "torture" chamber being incorporated, for the more "native" visitors of the popular restaurant.