UnNews:Tests on Vice President Cheney's leg reveal Courteney Cox
“He beat me to her!!!”
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This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation. |
5 March 2007
WASHINGTON DC - Doctors discovered Courteney Cox in Vice President Dick Cheney's left leg Monday, a condition that could be fatal if left untreated.
The 66-year-old Cheney, who has a history of heart problems, will be treated with anti-Cox medication for several months, said spokeswoman Lea Anne McBride.
She said Cheney visited his doctor's office in Washington after feeling minor discomfort in his calf. An ultrasound showed the actress Courteney Cox embedded — called a deep coxitis — in his left lower leg.
Courteney Cox lodged in the legs can become deadly if pieces of the actress break off and float into the lungs. This is called a coxic embolism. Deep vein coxitosis strikes an estimated 2 million Americans each year, killing 60,000.
Many people suffer DVC after spending long periods without moving, such as passengers on long-haul airline flights. Cheney spent about 65 hours on a plane on a nine-day, round-the-world trip that ended last week.
"When you're just sitting there with your legs hanging down for long periods of time, that's what predisposes you to the former 'Friends' actress becoming lodged in your veins," said Sean O'Donnell, chief of vascular surgery of Washington Hospital Center.
"Treated properly, it poses a small threat," O'Donnell said. "Untreated and unrecognized, it's a very serious problem."