UnNews:Tehran Gay Pride 2007 Announced
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This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation. |
11 March 2007
Tehran, Iranaphobia- President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has given his official approval of Tehran`s Gay Pride festival.
Although no official statement has been broadcast by Ahmadinejad (pronounced "Arrck! My Dinner! Jad!") Tehran`s Foreign Minister Rodney Dangerfield said in a official standup act yesterday "Hey, we don`t mind gays marching in Tehran, just along as they dennouce America!"
"Hey good crowd!"
"Good crowd...good crowd. I'm telling you I could use a good crowd."
Homosexuality is a tough topic in Iran, a "no-fun" Muslim country. Tehran`s hopes to use the Gay Pride festival to improve its international appearance, and use up its vast surplus of pink tshirts from the 1980s Iran-Iraq war.
"My cousins gay, I always tell him that in our family tree, he's in the fruit section!"
"Hey, Ahmadinejad, he`s a nice guy! We got a new gay marriage policy, its ok for gays to marry, but if they are unfaithful, they get stoned!"
Iran, a country with poor international relations as Mr Dangerfield pointed out. "Iran`s relations are bad, but hey, my relations are a lot worse, my I come from a stupid family. My father worked in a bank. They caught him stealing pens!"
"Hey no respect!"
"Bush keeps saying us Iranian`s should improve our relationships with international neighbours, they say 'love thy neighbor as thy self' , what am I supposed to do, jerk him off too?"
"Bush is some guy, the only American president stupid enough to fall off the floor!"
"Hey I`m kidding! Your alright!"
"Hey everybody! We`re all going to get laid!"