UnNews:Moronic T-shirt sparks airport row

This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation.

30 August 2006

Some are offended by this t-shirt design.

NEW YORK CITY, New York -- A prep of Anglo-Irish descent has said he was forced to remove a T-shirt that bore the words "Hüllister Ko. Kalifornija 1922. Sieg Heil!" before boarding a flight at New York, thus exposing his rock hard abdominal muscles and bulging pectorials. Theo Hawthorne said security officials warned him his clothing was "overpriced, offensive, and bland" after he checked in for a JetBlue flight to California on 12 August. Mr Hawthorne said he was shocked such an action could be taken in the US against a member of the social élite. US transport officials are conducting an inquiry after a complaint from the US Nazi Anti-Discrimination Committee. JetBlue said it was also investigating the incident but a spokeswoman said: "We're not clear exactly what happened."

Mr Hawthorne's puke-yellow cotton T-shirt bore both the slogan and a badly drawn representation of a swastika. He said he had cleared security at John F. Kennedy airport for a flight back to his multi-million dollar home in "So-Cali, mah gangsta bitch" when he was approached by two bikini babes who wanted to check his ID and boarding pass. Mr Hawthorne said he was told a number of scantily-clad female passengers with notoriously loose sexual mores had complained about his T-shirt - apparently concerned at what the Moronic phrase meant - and asked him to remove it and "give us all spankings." He refused, arguing that the slogan was not offensive, citing his constitutional rights to free expression, and saying the women were "fugly skanks." The girls replied, noting "He's probably gay."

Mr Hawthorne later told a New York radio station: "I grew up and spent all my life beating up Geeks, punks, and emos and I know that these things happen, but I'm shocked that they happened to me here, since I'm a soc." After a difficult exchange with airline staff, Mr Hawthorne was persuaded to wear another T-shirt he bought at the Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Hüllister Kompanie's store in New Jersey.

"Sieg Heil" is a slogan adopted by opponents of opponents of the war in Iraq and other conflicts in the Middle East. It is said to derive from the Nazi party which opposed Jew-Masonic rule in Germany.

Sources

• George Best "Lame T-shirt gets pwned!" BBC, August 30, 2006

• Hüllister Slüt "Wilkommen tu der Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Hüllister Kompanie!" Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Hüllister Kompanie, August 28, 2006