UnNews:Coyote $21,000 in debt

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Wednesday, August 21, 2019

This coyote wasted almost all its income on faulty Acme products.

PHOENIX, Arizona -- A wild coyote who stumbled through a college campus has been revealed to be $21,000 in debt. But not necessarily for student loans.

The animal has spent almost its entire income on faulty products from Acme, such as a giant mousetrap, a Batman costume, Glue V1, Triple-Strength Fortified Leg Muscle Vitamins, a female roadrunner costume, eight anvils, fifteen boxes of matches, a pair of rocket-powered roller skates, a Street Cleaners Wagon, a giant kite kit, bird seed, nitroglycerin, a detonator, a smokescreen bomb, grease, a giant rubber band, a Do-It-Yourself Tornado Kit and a jet bike.

The coyote, a male, held up a sign saying that he would sue the Acme Corporation for making "shoddy" products if he could afford an attorney and the legal fees.

The coyote spent most of its campus time in physical science, and in the library reading several books on how to catch roadrunners.