UnNews:Biden wins 2024 election
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This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation. |
WASHINGTON, District of Columbia, U.S.A., November 6, 2024
Americans are confused today as Joe Biden will remain president after winning the 2024 presidential election despite dropping out.
“Aww shucks, I was gonna go retire and eat ice cream til I drop!”
An apparent write-in favorite, Joe Biden has won the 2024 presidential election in a landslide victory. 538 electoral votes. Holy fucking shit. We are pretty sure nobody was expecting this to happen, and we at UnNews are absolutely gobsmacked at the results. States are starting to deploy the National Guard in an attempt to disperse crowds and the riots. It's unclear at this time whether this was planned or if every voter wrote in Biden without telling each other. Or if the vote-counters all fell asleep. I.. I am at a loss for words.
Republicans are in shambles right now, looks like they'll have to wait four more years to try and get Donald Trump back in office.
As of right now, Kamala Harris and Donald Trump have not made any official comment to the public except for an unhinged post on Truth Social from Trump.
Biden is scheduled to address the public later today and will hopefully calm this storm brewing in the United States.
“Fake News!!!”