User:PopGoesTheWeasel/The Wonders Magic Man Turns Me Into
You know User:Magic man? Eh? He's such a bitch. He turned me into a frog for the 14th time just yesterday. And, no, this is NOT a hate article like that Chief's love letter. Although I would love to hate on User:Magic man and call him a fucking screwed cunt mother fucker bitchy ass piece of shit - Chief would catch me and turn me into a potato. Well, I can assure you that being turned into a potato is much, MUCH better than being turned into a frog. But for the sake of dignity, I will decline Chief's request to turn me into a potato.
I don't even like frogs. I mean, User:Thekillerfroggy voted against on my article on VFH, of course I hate frogs! Bwahahahahaha! Oh, my! That was a good one! Lol! No, but seriously. I hate frogs. Their slimey skin, their bulging eyeballs and what's worst is that they don't even lose their virginity the way we do! But, hey, Magic man doesn't just turn me into frogs. He can turn me into cheese, onions, cabbages, butter, bread , chocolate and some other shit he can dream of when he's sleeping. Oh, and did I mention he sleeps hovering over a bed? That's real fucking creepy, isn't it?
Anyways, without further ado, I will reveal to you the wonders he can turn me into and how his elusiveness proved to be his downfall.