That time I was nearly raped by a negro during my sojourn to the post office

He looked like this: clearly, a psychopath.

That negro was terrifying!!

So there I was

In the midst of my Sunday afternoon post-churchgoing visit to the post office, no? Just doing my Presbyterian housewife things.

and this dastardly negro

bursts out from the deli, negro sweat all over the place, and instead of going for his crack cocaine, he forms a clear intention to mount me! My word!

so I pulled out my

canister of mace and briskly crossed the street, and he didn't follow, because negroes are afraid of traffic.

I barely got away with my power bill and six housekeeping magazines.

Terrifying. He nearly raped me.

See also

• Colin Powell
• That time I was nearly raped by the power rangers during my sojourn to the 90's